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Islam: Questions And Answers - Character and Morals

by Muhammad Saed Abdul-Rahman

PAGES:  364 (6 in x 9 in)
ISBN: 1861793189

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Character and Morals

Chapter 2

Bad Behaviour

49024: He wants to look at women in the street with the intention of proposing marriage

Question:

I live in a kaafir country where there is a lot of temptation. I want to get married and I am looking for a wife with certain features, especially beauty. I know that it is permissible to look at women with the intention of proposing marriage; is it permissible for me to look at women in the street in order to choose the one to whom I will propose marriage? Is it permissible, if I choose some girl and I like her and want to be sure that my family (who live in another country) will like her, to show her to a friend of mine even if it is for a few seconds?.


Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

It is not permissible to look at women in the street, because Allaah has commanded the believers to lower their gaze. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

"Tell the believing men to lower their gaze (from looking at forbidden things), and protect their private parts (from illegal sexual acts). That is purer for them. Verily, Allaah is AllAware of what they do"

[al-Noor 24:30]

If a person opens this door to himself, that is a dangerous matter. At first the Shaytaan makes the idea of proposing marriage attractive to him, until this becomes a regular habit, then he looks at women with no intention of proposing marriage, rather just for the purpose of looking at their beauty.

The man who wants to get married should not look at the unveiled women in the street, especially in that kaafir country where most of the people are kaafirs or immoral. Rather he should ask virtuous and knowledgeable people about virtuous and righteous women, and approach the matter in the proper manner.

With regard to looking at women in the street, this is looking at their external beauty only, not their inward beauty which is more important than outward beauty. What is the point if a man marrying the most beautiful of women if she is lacking in good attitude and religious commitment?

You should check yourself and review the qualities that you want in the woman you choose to marry, the most important of which is that she should be religiously committed and have a good attitude. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "A woman may be married for four things: her wealth, her lineage, her beauty, or her religious commitment. Choose the one who is religiously-committed, may your hands be rubbed with dust (i.e., may you prosper)." (Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 5090; Muslim, 1466)

The purpose of marriage is not merely to satisfy one's desires and enjoy intimacy, so that the man need care about nothing more than beauty; rather marriage is more sublime than that. So you should study the true qualities of your potential life-partner, those qualities that will make your life happy and calm, not a temporary happiness that will disappear as desire fades, leaving nothing but trouble and sadness after that. And Allaah knows best.

It is not permissible for you to show your friend the women to whom you propose marriage, and it is not permissible for him to look at her. A man should have protective jealousy (gheerah) concerning his wife and his honour. The Sahaabah were impressed by the strong gheerah of Sa'd ibn `Ubaadah (may Allaah be pleased with him), and the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "Are you amazed by the gheerah of Sa'd? I have more gheerah than him, and Allaah has more gheerah than me." Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 6846; Muslim, 1499.

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49670: A husband who claims to be religiously-committed but he is addicted to permissive channels

Question:

My husband is hafiz Qur'aan and he prays regularly on time, and he is well known among the people to be religiously-committed, but he loves the permissive channels. We have arguments and a bad relationship because of this. I have tried to make him understand that he is doing wrong, but with no success. I want a solution to this problem.


Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

Undoubtedly your husband _ according to what you say _ has fallen into a great fitnah (trial, temptation), and there is the fear that if he persists in this he may give up prayer and the good things that he is now doing, because the fitnah of looking at haraam things may lead to bad consequences for the religious commitment and morals of the sinner.

Looking is the basis for all the problems that befall a man, because looking generates thoughts, then thoughts generate ideas, then ideas generate desires, then desires generate will, which develops into resolve, then the action is done, and it is inevitable if there is nothing to stop it. Hence it is said that patience in lowering one's gaze is easier than patience in bearing the pain of what comes after that.

Al-Jawaab al-Kaafi, p. 106.

We have already outlined in the answer to question no. 22917 the benefits of lowering one's gaze, which include the fact that lowering one's gaze is obedience to the command of Allaah and it purifies one's heart, soul and actions. It also prevents the poisoned arrow from having any effect, for a glance is one of the poisoned arrows of Iblees. And the one who lowers his gaze is compensated with the sweetness of faith in the heart. It frees the heart from being controlled by desires, because the real prisoner is the one who is controlled by his desires.

The answer to question no. 20229 lists some of the ways that help one to lower the gaze, such as: remembering that Allaah is always watching you, seeking the help of Allaah, beseeching Him and praying to Him, striving to control one's nafs and get used to lowering the gaze and being patient in doing so.

The answer to question no 23425 mentions some of the effects that sin has on the one who commits it. These include:

Deprivation of knowledge, deprivation of provision, the fear that the sinner may become alienated from his Lord and from people, his affairs may become difficult, the sinner may find darkness in his soul, he may be deprived of obedience _ for sin leads to more of the same, and weakens a person's will to worship Allaah, and increases his will to commit sin; it gradually weakens his will to repent until the will to repent disappears from his heart completely. Then any feeling of abhorrence towards sin disappears from his heart and it becomes habitual for him, and he does not care if people see him or speak about him.

In the answer to question no. 33651 we have mentioned some of the ways of dealing with the fitnah of women.

One thing that upsets us is that your husband is one of those who have memorized the Qur'aan; what effect has the Qur'aan had on him?

We hope that he will read what we have said and the answers that we have referred to. May Allaah guide his heart and cause his physical faculties to do that which Allaah loves and is pleased with.

We would also like to say two more things to our brother:

1 _ He should seek Allaah's help to obey Him and ask Him to help him get rid of this problem. Shaykh Muhammad al-`Uthaymeen was asked about someone who had this problem and he replied:

This man who is suffering with this problem _ we ask Allaah to guide him _ is undoubtedly doing something haraam, for a glance is one of the arrows of Iblees _ we seek refuge with Allaah. How often has a glance brought trouble to a person's heart and he has become a prisoner to it. How often has a glance affected a person's heart so much that he has become a prisoner of an image. Hence if a person is affected by this problem, he has to turn to Allaah and ask him to heal him of that. He has to turn away from it and not lift his gaze to any woman or any beardless youth. At the same time he has to seek the help of Allaah and turn to Him, and ask Him to keep him safe from this disease. Then it will be lifted from him, if Allaah wills.

Majmoo' Fataawa al-Shaykh Ibn `Uthaymeen, 20/Shawwaal, no. 448.

Among the du'aa's that are appropriate in this situation is the following:

It was narrated that Shakl ibn Humayd said: I came to the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) and said: "O Prophet of Allaah, teach me a prayer for refuge with which I may seek refuge." He took my hand and said: "Say: `A'oodhu bika min sharri sam'i wa sharri baasri wa sharri lisaani wa sharri qalbi wa sharri maniyi (I seek refuge with You from the evil of my hearing, the evil of my sight, the evil of my tongue, the evil of my heart and the evil of my sexual desires),'" until I had memorized it.

Narrated by al-Tirmidhi, 3492; al-Nasaa'i, 5444; Abu Dawood, 1551. classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh Abi Dawood.

2 _ He should realize that his life may end with his evil deeds. Allaah may take his soul when he is looking at something that Allaah has forbidden him to look at, so in what state will he be on the Day when Allaah raises people from their graves? How will he meet his Lord when his life ended in such a way?

We ask Allaah to set his affairs straight and to guide him.

He should also read the answer to question no. 33651.

You should also look at the answer to question no. 7669, which explains how a wife should deal with a husband who watches pornographic movies and does not give her her rights.

And Allaah knows best.

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49943: He masturbated a great deal during Ramadaan _ what should he do?

Question:

If a person has the problem of masturbating daily, what should he do in Ramadaan?


Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

The correct scholarly view is that masturbation is haraam. For more information please see the answer to question no. 329.

With regard to the rulings concerning the daytime in Ramadaan, please see the answer to question no. 38074.

Young men have to fear Allaah their Lord, and keep away from listening to or looking at the things that will provoke their desire. They should make the most of Ramadaan to discipline themselves, for this is the month of the Qur'an and the month of piety. It is not befitting for a Muslim to fail to make the most of this month to forsake forbidden desires and seek reward, fearing his Lord. Allaah says of the fasting person in a hadeeth qudsi: "He forsakes his food, his drink and his desires for My sake." Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 1894; Muslim, 1151.

Shaykh Ibn `Uthaymeen said:

One should be patient in avoiding masturbation, because it is haraam as Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

"And those who guard their chastity (i.e. private parts, from illegal sexual acts)

6. Except from their wives or (the slaves) that their right hands possess, for then, they are free from blame;

7. But whoever seeks beyond that, then those are the transgressors"

[al-Mu'minoon 23:5-7]

And the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "O young men, whoever among you can afford to get married, let him do so, for it is more effective in lowering the gaze and guarding one's chastity. And whoever cannot afford that should fast."

If masturbation were permissible, the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) would have told them to do it, because it is easier and because people find pleasure in it, unlike fasting which is difficult. Because the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) enjoined fasting instead, this indicates that masturbation is not permissible.

Majmoo' Fataawa al-Shaykh Ibn `Uthaymeen, 19.189.

You should try hard to get married so that you can give up this bad habit. Seek the help of your Lord by praying to Him and obeying Him, so that you can rid yourself of this sinful habit.

We ask Allaah to purify your heart and protect you from sin, and to help you to do that which He loves and which pleases Him.

And Allaah knows best.

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40664: Practising the secret habit (masturbation) in Ramadaan without ejaculating

Question:

When I was a teenager I used to masturbate sometimes during the day in Ramadaan, but I did not let the semen come out of the penis because I blocked it, but I still reached climax.
What is the ruling on my fast, and how can I expiate for this grave sin? Please note that I do not know how many days I did this.


Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

It should be noted that this habit is haraam according to sharee'ah, as is indicated in the Book of Allaah and the Sunnah of His Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him). We have already quoted the evidence in detail in question no 329. This habit is something that is repulsive to sound human nature and reason, and it is not befitting for a Muslim to lower himself to this level.

It should also be noted that sin has negative consequences a person, in this world and in the Hereafter, if he does not repent and if Allaah does not bestow His mercy upon him. We have already discussed this in the following questions: 23425, 8861, 45040.

With regard to the ruling on the matter mentioned in the question, if you engaged in the secret habit but no semen came out as a result, then the fast is not invalidated, according to the most sound scholarly opinion, because what matters is the emission of semen. If it did come out then the fast was invalidated and it has to be made up. If it did not come out then the fast is not invalidated. But whatever the case you have to repent to Allaah and seek His forgiveness for wasting the fast by doing such things.

Semen may be emitted a short while later even if you prevented it from coming out. In that case the fast of that day is invalidated and you have to make it up. If you do not know how many days your fast was invalidated, then try to work it out until you reach a figure you think is most likely, then make up the days that you owe.

Shaykh Ibn `Uthaymeen said in Sharh Zaad al-Mustaqni': Is it possible for semen to move without being emitted?

Yes, that is possible, when a person's desire subsides for some reason, then semen does not come out.

And they gave another example: if a person holds his penis so that no semen comes out. Even though the fuqaha' gave this as an example, it is very harmful. The fuqaha' (may Allaah have mercy on them) gave something as an example regardless of how harmful or not it may be. But usually in such cases the semen is released after the person lets go of his penis.

Some of the scholars said that ghusl is not required if the semen moves. This is the view favoured by Shaykh al-Islam and is the correct view. The evidence for that is as follows:

1 _ The hadeeth of Umm Salamah in which it says: "Yes, if she sees water." He did not say, If she feels it moving. If ghusl were required when it moves, then he (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) would have pointed it out because there would have been a need to do so.

2 _ The hadeeth of Abu Sa'eed al-Khudri: "Water is for water." In this case there is no water (i.e., emission). So this hadeeth indicates that if there is no water (emission) there is no need for water (ghusl).

3 _ The basic principle is that the person remains pure (taahir) and no ghusl is required. This principle cannot be changed unless there is evidence to that effect.

Al-Sharh al-Mumti', 1/280

See also: al-Furoo', 1/197; al-Mabsoot, 1/67; al-Mughni, 1/128; al-Majmoo', 2/159; al-Mawsoo'ah al-Fiqhiyyah al-Kuwaitiyyah, 4/99

See also questions no. 38074 and 2571.

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40589: Practising the secret habit (masturbation) in Ramadaan

Question:

I have a friend who told me that he had practised the secret habit in Ramadaan and asked me: what is the ruling on that? After Ramadaan ended he made up that day _ what is the ruling?.

Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

Your friend has to realize that that this habit is haraam according to sharee'ah, as is indicated in the Book of Allaah and the Sunnah of His Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him). We have already quoted the evidence in detail in question no 329. This habit is something that is repulsive to sound human nature and reason, and it is not befitting for a Muslim to lower himself to this level.

It should also be noted that sin has negative consequences a person, in this world and in the Hereafter, if he does not repent and if Allaah does not bestow His mercy upon him. We have already discussed this in the following questions: 23425, 8861 .

This habit has many harmful effects, such as weakening the body, and increasing the gulf between a person and his Lord. It is one of the major factors in depression.

With regard to the matter mentioned in the question, if he ejaculated as a result of masturbation then his fast is invalidated and he has sinned; he has to refrain from eating and drinking for the rest of the day, and he also has to make up that day.

We have already discussed this in detail in the answer to questions no. 38074 and 2571. And Allaah knows best.

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45883: He is studying in a mixed university; how should he deal with female teachers and students?

Question:

I am a young man who is religiously committed. I am studying in a mixed university and I would like to develop my specialty further, but that requires me to interact in class, which will open channels of communication between me and other students. In addition to that there are female teachers who teach us very important subjects. How should I interact with the female students and teachers?.


Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

Studying in mixed schools, institutes and universities is not permitted. The evils that exist in these institutions because of that mixing are no secret, let alone the fact that people do not learn much, if anything, in these institutions. Wise people even in kaafir countries have called for segregation between the sexes in educational institutions because of the moral damage they have noticed and the weakening of educational standards. Trustworthy have scholars have issued fatwas stating that this kind of education is not permissible.

The scholars of the Standing Committee said:

It is haraam for male and female students and teachers to mix in educational institutions, because of the fitnah and provocation of desires and immoral conduct that results from that. The gravity of the sin is compounded if the female teachers and students uncover any part of their `awrahs or wear see-through or tight clothing, or if the students or teachers flirt or joke together, which may lead to transgression of limits and violation of honour.

Fataawa Islamiyyah, 3/102, 103

Shaykh Ibn `Uthaymeen (may Allaah have mercy on him) was asked:

Is it permissible for a man to study in a mixed university where men and women mix in one classroom, knowing that the student has a role to play in calling people to Allaah?

He replied:

What I think is that it is not permissible for anyone, man or woman, to study in a mixed school, because of the grave danger that it poses to his chastity, integrity and morals. No matter how great a person's integrity, morals and innocence, if a woman is sitting beside him on the seat _ especially if she is beautiful and unveiled _ he can hardly avoid fitnah and evil. Everything that leads to fitnah and evil is also haraam and is not permitted. We ask Allaah to keep our Muslim brothers safe from such things which will only bring evil, fitnah and corruption to their youth. If there is no other university apart from this one, he should go and study in another city or country where this mixing does not happen. I do not think that this is permissible but others may have a different opinion. Fataawa Islamiyyah, 3/103

We have already discussed the ruling on mixing in detail in the answer to question no. 1200.

See also the answers to questions no. 8827, 22397 and 6666.

This is easy those who do not have the problem of mixed schools in their country or who have access to colleges and universities that are not mixed, so they have no need to study in mixed colleges. But there remains the question of those who are faced with the problem of mixed schools in their countries. What should they do, especially if that will affect their chances of earning a living or of getting married in the future, since if they do not study in these colleges they will not be able to find a job or get married.

In this case, there is no option, and the need is great, and when the need is great, the matter may come under the heading of necessity. This necessity may be taken into consideration, provided that the following conditions are met:

1- That there be no other place where he can study, even if it is in another country

2- That he cannot obtain this certificate by means of distance learning or studying via the internet, for example

3- That he goes to study in these mixed places seeking the help of Allaah to confront fitnah.

He should take care to lower his gaze as much as he can and not touch or shake hands with non-mahram women or be alone with them, and he should not sit right next to them.

He should advise the girls to sit away from the boys and adhere to other Islamic guidelines as well.

4- If he notices himself slipping towards haraam things and being tempted by those of the opposite sex who are with him, then the soundness of his religious commitment is more important than any worldly aims, so he has to leave the place immediately and Allaah will make him independent of means by His bounty. And Allaah is the One Whose help we seek.

And Allaah knows best.

There follows a list of colleges and universities that are not mixed:

1- The Medical College in Dubai

2- Al-Azhar University in Egypt

3- The Imam Muhammad ibn Sa'ood Islamic University in Saudi

4- Umm al-Qura University in Makkah al-Mukarramah

5- The Islamic University in Madeenah al-Munawwarah

6- The King Sa'ood University in Saudi.

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42165: How can I advise someone who is addicted to pornography?

Question:

I have a friend who uses the internet and goes to pornographic websites. What is the shar'i ruling on that, and how can I help him to keep away from such things?.


Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

It is not permissible to look at pornographic pictures that show the charms of women, either on internet web sites or in newspapers or magazines etc. That is because looking at them is a means of enjoying them and knowing the beauty of the woman in the picture.

This may also be a means that leads to something haraam, so it is also regarded as haraam, because the means come under the same rulings as the ends.

Fataawa al-Lajnah al-Daa'imah, 2424.

Many people take the matter of looking at pictures of non-mahram women lightly, on the grounds that these are just pictures and are not real. But this is a very serious matter, because it inevitably tempts a man to try to look at the woman directly. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

"Tell the believing men to lower their gaze (from looking at forbidden things), and protect their private parts (from illegal sexual acts). That is purer for them"

[al-Noor 24:30]

Majmoo' Fataawa wa Rasaa'il Ibn `Uthaymeen, 1/268

You can help your friend to keep away from these things by always advising him and making him fear Allaah, and reminding him that Allaah is always watching him and that nothing is hidden from Him. And remind him of the blessings that Allaah has bestowed upon him, such as giving him eyes with which to see things that will benefit him, and He has forbidden him to use them to look at things that He has forbidden. Remind him that Allaah will question him about that, hence Allaah concludes the verse referred to above with the words (interpretation of the meaning):

"Verily, Allaah is AllAware of what they do"

[al-Noor 24:30]

And Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

"Verily, the hearing, and the sight, and the heart of each of those ones will be questioned (by Allaah)"

[al-Isra' 17:36]

If a wise man thinks about it, when he is looking at these haraam pictures, he will realize that there is nothing behind these glances but loss, pain and sorrow, because he cannot really get what he sees in these pictures.

The poet spoke the truth when he said:

"When you give free rein to your eyes, this will cause great pain to your heart.

You will see what you cannot have, and you will feel frustration because you do not have some of what you see."

So it is clear that there is nothing to be gained from these pictures except the wrath of Allaah, and wasting time and money on things that are not pleasing to Him, and tormenting yourself.

The Muslim has to seek chastity by means of marriage, and try his best to achieve that.

He should also give up bad company who may have a bad effect on him and encourage him to go to these bad web sites.

He should also keep himself busy with things that will benefit him in both religious and worldly terms, such as memorizing the Book of Allaah, attending gatherings of dhikr, and going to useful websites that contain sound knowledge. Islam Q&A (www.islam-qa.com)

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45647: How can one avoid getting angry quickly?

Question:

I am a person who gets angry quickly, and I cannot control myself when I argue with anyone, even my parents. Please tell me of ways and means of avoiding getting angry quickly. May Allaah reward you with good.

Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

Allaah has commanded us to honour our parents and treat them kindly in word and deed, and he has forbidden us to offend them in word and deed, even in the slightest manner.

Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

"And your Lord has decreed that you worship none but Him. And that you be dutiful to your parents. If one of them or both of them attain old age in your life, say not to them a word of disrespect, nor shout at them but address them in terms of honour.

24. And lower unto them the wing of submission and humility through mercy, and say: `My Lord! Bestow on them Your Mercy as they did bring me up when I was young.'"

[al-Isra' 17:23-24]

And the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) advised us not to get angry, i.e., to avoid the causes that lead to that and to be careful of what may result from that.

It was narrated from Abu Hurayrah (may Allaah be pleased with him) that a man said to the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him): "Advise me." He said: "Do not get angry." He repeated his question several times and he said: "Do not get angry."

Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 5765.

The Muslim should be above getting angry for his own sake or for the sake of anyone other than Allaah, because that may lead to regrettable consequences either in this world or in the Hereafter, or in both.

Ibn Muflih al-Hanbali said:

`Ali ibn Abi Taalib (may Allaah be pleased with him) said: It may be known whether a person is really patient at the time of anger. And he used to say that the beginning of anger is madness and the end of it is regret, and anger cannot be justified by offering a humble apology. Calamities may come because of anger. It was said to al-Shu'bi: Why is a person who is quick to get angry also quick to calm down, and the one who is slow to get angry is slow to clam down. He said: Because anger is like fire; that which is easier to start is easier to extinguish.

Al-Adaab al-Shar'iyyah, 1/183

If something happens to a Muslim that makes him angry, he should remember the advice of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him): "Do not get angry," as if the hadeeth applies directly to him. And he should remember that Allaah has commanded him to treat his parents well and has forbidden him to offend them, as if he has heard that from Him directly.

There are means of soothing anger if it arises, which will enable the one who does them to cure himself of anger and its effects. Al-Maawirdi mentioned a good number of them when he said:

"Remember that there are means of soothing anger if it arises, which a person may use to help himself become patient. These include:

1 _ Remembering Allaah, which should make him fear Him; this fear will motivate him to obey Him, so he will resume his good manners, at which point his anger will fade.

Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

"And remember your Lord when you forget" [al-Kahf 18:24]

`Ikrimah said: i.e., when you get angry. And Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

"And if an evil whisper comes to you from Shaytaan (Satan), then seek refuge with Allaah"

[al-A'raaf 7:200]

i.e., if the Shaytaan makes you angry _ then seek refuge with Allaah, for He is the All-Hearer, All-Knower _ i.e., He hears the ignorance of the ignorant and He knows the things that take anger away from you.

One of the wise men said: Whoever remembers the power of Allaah will not use his own power to wrong the slaves of Allaah. `Abd-Allaah ibn Muslim ibn Muhaarib said to Haroon al-Rasheed: "O Ameer al-Mu'mineen, I ask You by the One before Whom you are more insignificant than I am before you, and by the One Who has more power to punish you than you have to punish me: why don't you let me off?" So he left him off, because he had reminded him of the power and might of Allaah.

2 _ He should get out of the situation he is in, so that his anger will dissipate because of his moving away from that situation.

It was narrated that Abu Dharr said: The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said to us: "If one of you gets angry when he is standing, let him sit down, and if that does not take away his anger, then let him lie down." Narrated by Abu Dawood, 4782; classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh Abi Dawood.

3 _ He should remember what anger leads to of regret and the need to apologize.

One of the literary figures said: Beware of the pride of anger, for it leads to the humiliation of apology.

4 _ He should remember the reward for forgiving others and of being tolerant, so he should force himself to overcome his anger, seeking that reward and so as to avoid deserving blame and punishment. Raja' ibn Haywah said to `Abd al-Malik ibn Marwaan, when he had the power to capture some of his enemies: "Allaah has given you the victory that you wanted, so give Allaah what He wants of forgiveness." A man said something that `Umar ibn `Abd al-`Azeez disliked to hear, so `Umar said: "You wanted the Shaytaan to provoke me because of my position so that I would be harsh with you and in return you would harm me tomorrow (i.e., on the Day of Resurrection). Go away, may Allaah have mercy on you."

5 _ He should remind himself of the way that people like and respect him, and he should not risk losing that because of his anger, so that people change their minds about him. He should know that by forgiving people he will only increase the respect with which they view him.

As the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "Allaah will not increase a person who forgives others except in honour." Narrated by Muslim, 2588.

And one of the poets said:

"It is not a trait of nobility to be swift in seeking revenge.

And generosity does not lead to a loss of blessings."

Adab al-Dunya wa'l-Deen, p. 258-260.

For more details on how to deal with anger, see the answer to question no. 658.

And Allaah is the Source of strength.

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43012: Allaah is Severe in punishment

Question:

One of my friends listens to music. When he is given advice, he responds by saying that Allaah is Forgiving and Most merciful, but I tell him that Allaah is Severe in punishment. I would like some evidence from the Sunnah and Qur'aan that Allaah is Severe in punishment.


Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

The questioner is to be appreciated for his keenness to guide his friend. Friends should be keen to advise and guide their brothers, without worrying about their reaction or getting tired. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

"The believers, men and women, are Awliyaa' (helpers, supporters, friends, protectors) of one another; they enjoin (on the people) AlMa`roof (i.e. Islamic Monotheism and all that Islam orders one to do), and forbid (people) from AlMunkar (i.e. polytheism and disbelief of all kinds, and all that Islam has forbidden); they perform As-Salaah (Iqaamat-as-Salaah), and give the Zakaah, and obey Allaah and His Messenger. Allaah will have His Mercy on them. Surely, Allaah is All-Mighty, All-Wise"

[al-Tawbah 9:71]

Secondly: the majority of scholars are of the view that music is haraam, as is indicated by a great deal of evidence from the Qur'aan and Sunnah. This was narrated from Ibn `Abbaas, Ibn Mas'ood, al-Shu'bi, al-Thawri and other scholars.

See Sunan al-Bayhaqi, 10/223; al-Muhalla, 9/59; al-Mughni, 14/160

See also question no. 5000

Thirdly: there are many verses and hadeeths which speak of the severity of Allaah's punishment. These texts may be divided into two Islam & Muslims:

1 _ Those which deal directly with music

2 _ Those which speak of the severity of Allaah's punishment in general

With regard to the first category, a number of hadeeths have been narrated concerning this.

It was narrated that Anas ibn Maalik (may Allaah be pleased with him) said: The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "Two sounds are cursed in this world and the Hereafter: flutes (musical instruments) at times of joy and wailing at times of sorrow." Narrated by al-Bazzaar and al-Diya' al-Maqdisi in al-Ahaadeeth al-Mukhtaarah; classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Tahreem Alaat al-Tarb, p. 51.

Being cursed means being cast out far from the mercy of Allaah.

Al-Tirmidhi narrated (2138) from `Imraan ibn Husayn that the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "Among this ummah will be (people who will be) swallowed up by the earth, transformed into pigs and monkeys, and pelted with stones from above." A man among the Muslims said, "O Messenger of Allaah, when will that be?" He said: "When female singers and musical instruments appear, and wine is drunk." Classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Tirmidhi.

With regard to the second category: In the Qur'aan Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

"O you who believe! Ward off yourselves and your families against a Fire (Hell) whose fuel is men and stones, over which are (appointed) angels stern (and) severe, who disobey not, (from executing) the Commands they receive from Allaah, but do that which they are commanded"

[al-Tahreem 66:6]

"The Day they will be dragged on their faces into the Fire (it will be said to them): Taste you the touch of Hell!"

[al-Qamar 54:48]

"But if you do it not, and you can never do it, then fear the Fire (Hell) whose fuel is men and stones" [al-Baqarah 2:24]

"When iron collars will be rounded over their necks, and the chains, they shall be dragged along,

72. In the boiling water, then they will be burned in the Fire"[Ghaafir 40:71-72]

"and every obstinate, arrogant dictator (who refuses to believe in the Oneness of Allaah) was brought to a complete loss and destruction.

16. In front of him (every obstinate, arrogant dictator) is Hell, and he will be made to drink boiling, festering water.

17. He will sip it unwillingly, and he will find a great difficulty to swallow it down his throat, and death will come to him from every side, yet he will not die and in front of him, will be a great torment"

[Ibraaheem 14:15-17]

"Verily, the tree of Zaqqoom

44. Will be the food of the sinners.

45. Like boiling oil, it will boil in the bellies,

46. Like the boiling of scalding water.

47. (It will be said:) Seize him and drag him into the midst of blazing Fire,

48. Then pour over his head the torment of boiling water.

49. Taste you (this)! Verily, you were (pretending to be) the mighty, the generous!"

[al-Dukhaan 44:43-49]

"then as for those who disbelieved, garments of fire will be cut out for them, boiling water will be poured down over their heads.

20. With it will melt (or vanish away) what is within their bellies, as well as (their) skins.

21. And for them are hooked rods of iron (to punish them).

22. Every time they seek to get away therefrom, from anguish, they will be driven back therein, and (it will be) said to them: Taste the torment of burning!"

[al-Hajj 22:19-22]

In the Sunnah, the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "Hell will be brought on the Day of Resurrection with seventy thousand reins, each of which will be held by seventy thousand angels, dragging it along." Narrated by Muslim, 2842.

And he said: "This fire of yours which is lit by the sons of Adam is one seventieth part of the fire of Hell." They said: "By Allaah, if it was like this that would be sufficient." He said: "It is sixty-nine times worse than that, each time as hot as this (worldly fire)." Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 3265; Muslim, 2843.

And he said: "Allaah has promised that whoever drinks intoxicants, He will give him to drink of the mud of khabaal." They said: "O Messenger of Allaah, what is the mud of khabaal?" He said: "The sweat of the people of Hell" or "The juices of the people of Hell." Narrated by Muslim, 2002.

And he said: "If a drop of Zaqqoom were to fall in this world, it would destroy the livelihood of the people of this world, so how about the one whose food it is?" Narrated by al-Tirmidhi, 2585; classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Jaami', 5126.

And he said: "The most lightly punished person in Hell will have two sandals and laces of fire because of which his brains will boil like a cauldron. He will not think that anyone else is more severely punished than him, but he will be the most lightly punished." Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 6562; Muslim, 213.

And he said: "The man from among the people of Hell who lived the most luxurious life in this world will be brought and dipped in the Fire, then it will be said to him, `O son of Adam, have you ever seen anything good, have you ever enjoyed any pleasure?' and he will say, `No, by Allaah, O Lord.'" Narrated by Muslim, 2707.

And he said: "If there were in this mosque one hundred thousand or more, and there was among them a man from the people of Hell and he breathed out and his breath touched them, the mosque and everyone in it would be burned." Narrated by al-Bazzaar; classed a saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Targheeb, 3668.

Ibn al-Qayyim said in al-Jawaab al-Kaafi, p. 53-68:

Many ignorant people rely on the mercy of Allaah and His forgiveness and kindness, and they ignore His commands and prohibitions, and forget that He is severe in punishment and He does not ward off His wrath from evildoers. Whoever relies on His forgiveness whilst persisting in sin is like one who is stubborn.

One of the scholars said: If Allaah has decreed that the hand is to be cut off for stealing three dirhams, then do not feel safe from His punishment in the Hereafter.

It was said to al-Hasan: "We see that you weep a great deal." He said: "I am afraid lest Allaah throws me in the Fire and does not care about me."

And he used to say: "Some people indulged in wishful thinking about forgiveness until they departed this world without having repented, and they would say: `I think positively of my Lord,' but he was lying. If he had thought positively about his Lord, he would have done good deeds.

Then he mentioned some of the hadeeths which speak of the severity of Allaah's punishment, then he said:

There are far more hadeeths on this subject than we can mention. The one who is sincere should not ignore them and give himself free rein to commit sin and depend on his hope and positive thoughts about Allaah.".

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45001: Every time he improves in worship, he goes back to sin

Question:

I have a problem. Every time I do more acts of worship and my faith improves and I do more naafil acts of worship, Sunnahs and things that are mustahabb, I end up committing the secret habit (masturbation) despite the fact that I am married and have a happy family life. When I do this thing I feel that I am committing sin and I feel ashamed before Allaah. So I strive to increase my faith but it is not long before I do the same thing again. I am in a bad situation _ please help me. I heard on a tape that some people are filled with self-admiration when they increase their acts of worship, so Allaah causes them to commit sin so that they will realize that they are still slaves who have no right to admire their deeds, and whatever they do is still only a little. Am I one of these people? Is what I understood from that tape correct?

Please note that, praise be to Allaah, I pray and adhere to most of the teachings of Islam, but this problem gets worse every time I do more naafil acts of worship. What is the solution? Please help me, may Allaah reward you with good.


Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

What you have mentioned _ that Allaah may test a person with sin in order to bring him back to Him, and so that he will not admire himself _ has been mentioned by some of the scholars. Ibn al-Qayyim (may Allaah have mercy on him) said:

"Sin may be more beneficial for a person, if it leads him to repent, than doing a lot of acts of worship. This is what is meant by the words of one of the salaf: `A person may commit a sin and enter Paradise because of it, or he may do an act of worship and enter Hell because of it.' They said: `How is that?' He said: `He may commit a sin and continues to think about it, and when he stands or sits or walks he remembers his sin, so he feels ashamed and repents and seeks forgiveness and regrets it, so that will be the means of his salvation. And he may do a good deed and continue to think about it, and when he stands or sits or walks he remembers it and it fills him with self-admiration and pride, so it is the cause of his doom. So the sin may be the factor that leads him to do acts of worship and good deeds and to change his attitude so that he fears Allaah and feels shy before Him and feels humiliated before Him, hanging his head in shame and weeping with regret, seeking he forgiveness of his Lord. Each of these effects is better for a person than an act of worship that makes him feel proud and show off and look down on people. Undoubtedly this sin is better before Allaah and is more likely to bring salvation than one who admires himself and looks down on others, and who thinks that he is doing Allaah a favour. Even if he says words that indicate something other than that, Allaah is the Witness over what is in his heart. Such a person may feel hatred towards people if they do not hold him in high esteem and humiliate themselves before him. If he were to examine himself honestly, he would see that clearly." Madaarij al-Saalikeen, 1/299

Shaykh Ibn `Uthaymeen said:

"How often is it the case that one of us will be better after committing sin than he was before. In many instances a person errs and falls into sin, then he feels ashamed in his heart before Allaah and he turns to Him and repents to Him, so that he thinks of that sin all the time and continually regrets it and seeks forgiveness. But another person may think that he is obedient (towards Allaah) and that he is one of the people who obey and worship Him, so he starts to admire himself and does not turn to Allaah, which adversely affects his religious commitment. Allaah is Wise and may test a person with sin in order to set him straight, just as He may test a person with hunger in order to improve his health. Adam was only chosen after he had committed sin and repented therefrom.

As Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

"Then his Lord chose him, and turned to him with forgiveness, and gave him guidance" [Ta-Ha 20:122] i.e., after he had sinned and repented, his Lord chose him and accepted his repentance and guided him. Looks at those who stayed behind from the campaign of Tabook _ what happened to them? Undoubtedly their faith increased and they attained a higher status than they had before. Could the verses concerning them that will be recited until the Day of Resurrection have been revealed if they had not done that then repented to Allaah?" al-Sharh al-Mumti', 3/66

Moreover it should be noted that this habit is haraam according to sharee'ah, as is indicated by the Book of Allaah and the Sunnah of His Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him). We have already quoted the evidence in detail in the answer to question no. 329. This habit is also something that is regarded as repulsive according to man's instincts and reason, and it is not befitting for a Muslim to lower himself to the level of doing that.

It should also be noted that sin has a negative effect on a person in this world and in the Hereafter, if he does not repent and if Allaah does not bestow His mercy upon him. We have already discussed this in detail in the following questions: 23425 and 8861.

There are causes for this habit, so keep away from them so that you will be able to give it up. You should do the following things:

1- Strive to keep company with good, righteous, pious people, and learn from them and their experiences.

2- Always remember Allaah and recite Qur'aan, and adopt a daily wird (collection of du'aa's and dhikrs) that you recite every day without fail.

3- Set yourself a program for learning Islamic knowledge etc.

4- Set yourself an exercise program, or join a sports club

5- Do a lot of naafil acts of worship, especially voluntary fasts, for this is an important means of resisting temptation and reducing desire.

6- Strive in making du'aa' and ask Allaah to rid you of this forbidden bad habit and to strengthen your resolve.

7- Remember that the harms caused by the secret habit are innumerable; it weakens the body, saps one's strength, and increases the distance between a person and his Lord. It is a major factor in depression and feelings of sin.

8- Avoid being alone as much as possible, because this habit is one of the effects of being alone.

9- Try to pray in the mosque, and pray qiyaam al-layl, because this will bring tranquility to the heart.

10-Finally, you have to repent continually, weep with fear of Allaah, humble yourself before Him, and ask Him to forgive you. If you resolve firmly each time not to go back to that habit, then your nafs threatens to overwhelm you, then resist it. "But as for him who feared standing before his Lord, and restrained himself from impure evil desires and lusts, Verily, Paradise will be his abode" [al-Naazi'aat 79:40 _ interpretation of the meaning]. If you give in, then repent anew, and renew your promise (not to do it again). Do not despair of the mercy of Allaah, and do a great deal of naafil acts of worship and righteous deeds. "And perform AsSalaat (Iqaamatas Salaat), at the two ends of the day and in some hours of the night [i.e. the five compulsory Salaat (prayers)]. Verily, the good deeds remove the evil deeds (i.e. small sins). That is a reminder (an advice) for the mindful (those who accept advice)" [Hood 11:114].

May Allaah help you to do all that is good.

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12301: It is not permissible to watch pornography at all, not even with one's wife

Question:

pornography is prohibited in islam. How big a sin is "watching" pornographic material with your wife once in a while?


Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

Watching pornography is forbidden, whether a person is married or not. The one who does that has to repent to Allaah. How can a person watch such things with his wife and he can he permit her to watch it too? Women are weak and are easily influenced; indeed watching such things may lead to problems between the spouses which may end up in divorce _ Allaah forbid. Undoubtedly if a man approves of such a thing he is lacking in gheerah (protective jealousy), which is what distinguishes a Muslim from others, from kaafirs and duyooths (cuckolds) who approve of obscenity and immorality in their families. Moreover, watching such material makes one take the matter of immorality lightly and encourages promiscuity. We ask Allaah to keep us safe and sound. Let the one who has committed such a sin beware of the punishment of Allaah; let him hasten to repent. He should be keen to look for anything that may help his wife to remain chaste, not for things that will encourage immoral actions. And Allaah knows best.

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34638: Being careless with the aim of dying in the land of the Two Holy Sanctuaries (al-Haramayn)

Question:

Many pilgrims who come to the land of the Two Holy Sanctuaries expose themselves to things that could cause death, seeking thereby to die in the land of the Two Holy Sanctuaries. They do that by being careless and not taking precautions to protect themselves, such as deliberately staying out in the hot sun, exposing themselves to traffic danger, and other kinds of threats to life. What is your opinion on that?.


Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

I advice my brother pilgrims and others to beware of this carelessness and to keep away from causes of danger as much as possible, because Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

"And do not kill yourselves (nor kill one another). Surely, Allaah is Most Merciful to you"

[al-Nisa' 4:29]

"and do not throw yourselves into destruction"

[al-Baqarah 2:195]

And the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "Whoever kills himself with something will be punished with it on the Day of Resurrection."

And there are many similar verses and hadeeths.

May Allaah help us all to do that which pleases Him and bless us and all the Muslims with understanding of His religion and make us steadfast in adhering to it.

Majmoo' Fataawa wa Maqaalaat Mutanawwi'ah by Shaykh `Abd al-`Azeez ibn `Abd-Allaah ibn Baaz (may Allaah have mercy on him), vol 8, p. 358. (www.islam-qa.com)

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45433: It is haraam for students to cheat in tests

Question:

What is the ruling on students cheating in tests at school?.


Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

The hadeeth, "Whoever cheats us is not one of us" is saheeh, and it is general in meaning, including cheating in buying and selling, in giving advice, and in promises and covenants, in trusts, in exams in schools and institutes, and so on. That includes copying out material from books, taking answers from other students and giving them answers, whether spoken or written down on papers passed among them.

And Allaah is the Source of strength.

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40040: Her husband is threatening to divorce her if she does not watch pornographic movies with him

Question:

A woman's husband tries to force her to watch pornographic movies with her and she refuses to do that and tries to stop him; she told him to choose between her and these movies and he chose the movies instead of her, What should she do _ when he has threatened to divorce her if she does not watch these movies with him? What advice do you give her? Should she watch them or get a divorce _ especially since she has three children with him?.


Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

Allaah has commanded the Muslim to protect himself and his family from the Fire. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

"O you who believe! Ward off yourselves and your families against a Fire (Hell) whose fuel is men and stones, over which are (appointed) angels stern (and) severe, who disobey not, (from executing) the Commands they receive from Allaah, but do that which they are commanded"

[al-Tahreem 66:6]

Allaah has put the wife and children under the care and protection of the husband, and he will be asked about them on the Day of Resurrection. It was narrated from Ibn `Umar that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "Each of you is a shepherd and each of you is responsible for his flock. The ruler is a shepherd and is responsible for his flock; the man is the shepherd of his family members and is responsible for them; the woman is the shepherd of her husband's house and children and is responsible for them; the slave is the shepherd of his master's wealth and is responsible for it. Each of you is a shepherd and each of you is responsible for his flock."

Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 853; Muslim, 1829.

Allaah has warned those who betray this trust and do not protect their families as required, that they will be denied Paradise. It was narrated that Ma'qal ibn Yassaar said: The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "There is no person whom Allaah appoints in charge of some flock and he is not sincere towards them, but he will not smell the fragrance of Paradise."

Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 6731; Muslim, 142.

What this husband is doing, watching pornographic movies, is an evil and a great sin. It is not permissible for him to do that, let alone force someone else to do it.

If the husband calls his wife to watch these movies, it is not permissible for her to obey him, because the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "There is no obedience if it involves disobeying Allaah, rather obedience is only with regard to that which is right and proper." Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 7257; Muslim, 1840.

The husband's threat of divorce does not count as a legitimate excuse for her, and is not regarded as her being forced to do it. Rather she should advise him in the way that is better. If he responds and gives up the evil that he is doing, this is something good that he is doing for himself, and she will be rewarded for that. If he refuses to respond to the command of Allaah to lower the gaze and avoid looking at haraam things, then it is not permissible for her to obey him in committing sin, and she should not trust him with regard to herself or her children, and Allaah will compensate her with someone better than him, in sha Allaah.

In the answer to question no. 12301 there is a statement of the shar'i ruling on watching these movies. In the answer to question no. 7669 there is a description of ways of advising and guiding this husband.

If the husband does not pray, it is not permissible for the wife to hesitate in asking for an annulment of the marriage. We have discussed the ruling on staying with a husband who does not pray in the answer to question no. 4501 and 5281. And Allaah knows best. Islam Q&A

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40163Title: Her son practices the secret habit every day. What should she do?

Question:

I am the mother of an only child, a seven year old boy, and recently I found him practicing the secret habit (masturbation). Every time I ask him if he did it today he tells me, quite frankly, yes. I forbade him to do this haraam action, then I started to take away some privileges and even hit him, but with no success. He is still doing it every day, maybe even more than once. I got tired of keeping an eye on him, and I feel ashamed before Allaah that this sin may stay with him until he grows up, and he may persist in not repenting, so he will get used to sin and regard it as insignificant, and so his heart will become deadened when he is still young.

Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

The family is often responsible for the children falling into sin, because they do not urge children to worship Allaah and they make available the means of falling into sin.

We do not know what is really happening here, but it may be that the circumstances surrounding this boy have made him fall into sin. He is an only child, and an only child is usually spoiled, which makes the means of falling into sin readily available. This problem may be dealt with in a number of ways:

1 _ Reducing the extent to which he is spoiled, because spoiling him makes him feel that he is not a man, so he tries to prove that he is a man by means of this habit or smoking, for example.

2 _ Not making the means of falling into sin available, especially those which contribute to deadening of the heart, such as giving him music tapes to listen to and providing satellite channels for him to watch.

3 _ Try not to let the child sleep alone or close the door when he is asleep, because being alone makes it easy to think about sin and encourages one to do it.

4 _ Making the child feel attached to the mosque and its study circles, and to righteous friends. These are the greatest means of helping a person to correct his ways and strengthen his faith.

5 _ Providing a useful Islamic audio-visual library, which will create in him a love for worship, teach him good manners and deter him from falling into sin.

6- Encouraging him to read, especially books that have to do with biographies of the scholars and heroic mujaahideen. Perhaps he will acquire some of their attributes and follow in their footsteps. It is better to encourage him to encourage him to write a summary of what he reads, hears and watches, and to give him a suitable reward for that.

7 _ Encourage him to memorize Qur'aan and fast; undoubtedly these will strengthen him spiritually.

8 _Try to organize his time so that he will be active during the day and will sleep early, because staying up late may make him think at length about sin.

9 _ Explain to him the shar'i ruling on this habit and its effect on the mind, heart and faculties.

10 _ Avoid humiliating him, hitting him and embarrassing him, because hitting him, humiliating him and embarrassing him will not make him give up this sin and others like it, rather you should deal with him in the way that is best and by giving him good advice.

And Allaah is the source of strength.

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40233: Her friend keeps company with men and commits sins, and she refuses to accept advice. What is to be done?

Question:

I am a university student. I have a friend who does not pray regularly. She is stubborn and does not accept advice, and she listens only to songs. She has a bad friend whom she refuses to keep away from. She does not go home during vacations unless this friend also goes home. Through circumstances at the university she has gotten to know a group of young men, claiming that she is helping them. She corresponds with them and talks to them. When she goes out she has to adorn herself and put on perfume, even though she knows the ruling on that. We have tried to advise her but she refuses to take out advice. What can I do to help her?.

Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

Firstly:

Studying in a mixed environment is haraam, and it causes a great deal of mischief in society. What the sister says in her question is only a small part of the results of forbidden mixing.

We advise everyone who wants to protect himself and not to fall into that which Allaah has forbidden to keep away from these mixed places as much as possible, whether that is for study or for work, because of the things involved that go against sharee'ah and because of the evils to which they may lead.

Secondly:

What the questioner has mentioned about her friend is very unfortunate; we ask Allaah to guide her and bring her back to the right path. Your duties towards her are to offer sincere advice and guidance, and to remind her of Allaah and that death is real, and that this world does not last.

Allaah has created Paradise for those who obey Him, and He has created Hell for those who disobey Him. If she responds to the advice then praise be to Allaah. If she insists on committing sin and following the path of the Shaytaan, then Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

"The duty of the Messenger [i.e. Our Messenger Muhammad whom We have sent to you, (O mankind)] is nothing but to convey (the Message)"

[al-Maa'idah 5:99]

"And remind (by preaching the Qur'aan, O Muhammad), for verily, the reminding profits the believers"

[al-Dhaariyaat 51:55]

"So remind them (O Muhammad) — you are only one who reminds.

22. You are not a dictator over them"

[al-Ghaashiyah 88:21-22]

"O you who believe! Take care of your ownselves. If you follow the (right) guidance [and enjoin what is right (Islamic Monotheism and all that Islam orders one to do) and forbid what is wrong (polytheism, disbelief and all that Islam has forbidden)] no hurt can come to you from those who are in error" [al-Maa'idah 5:105]

Try to look for righteous friends who can help you to adhere to the truth. Beware of sitting with bad companions, for Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

"And it has already been revealed to you in the Book (this Qur'aan) that when you hear the Verses of Allaah being denied and mocked at, then sit not with them, until they engage in a talk other than that; (but if you stayed with them) certainly in that case you would be like them. Surely, Allaah will collect the hypocrites and disbelievers all together in Hell"

[al-Nisa' 4:140]

And Allaah is the Source of strength.

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27190: What is the ruling on one who discloses secrets?

Question:

What is mentioned in Quaran and Hadeeth about revealing a secret to someone that was told in confidence?.


Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

Secrets are a kind of trust, and thus they are a kind of contract or covenant which must be kept. It is necessary to be harsh with those who disclose them, because they are betraying a trust and breaking their promise; and those who deserve to a ta'zeer punishment should be punished.

Secrets vary. There are those for which the person who discloses them must be dealt with harshly, because disclosing them causes widespread harm, such as disclosing secrets to the kuffaar and enabling them to defeat the Muslims or gain victory over them. This is what is known in modern parlance as high treason. And there are secrets that are less serious, such as those in which disclosure causes harm to individuals. But in all cases disclosure is a betrayal of the trust and breaking of the covenant.

Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

"And fulfil (every) covenant. Verily, the covenant will be questioned about"

[al-Isra' 17:34]

"Verily, Allaah commands that you should render back the trusts to those, to whom they are due"

[al-Nisa' 4:58]

So if keeping secrets is obligatory, then disclosing them is haraam.

The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) told a secret to `Aa'ishah and Hafsah and entrusted them with it, but they disclosed the secret, and Allaah rebuked them for that.

Allaah said (interpretation of the meaning):

"And (remember) when the Prophet disclosed a matter in confidence to one of his wives (Hafsah), then she told it (to another i.e. `Aa'ishah). And Allaah made it known to him; he informed part thereof and left a part. Then when he told her (Hafsah) thereof, she said: `Who told you this?' He said: `The AllKnower, the AllAware (Allaah) has told me.'"

[al-Tahreem 66:3]

Then Allaah said (interpretation of the meaning):

"If you two (wives of the Prophet: `Aa'ishah and Hafsah) turn in repentance to Allaah, (it will be better for you), your hearts are indeed so inclined (to oppose what the Prophet likes); but if you help one another against him (Muhammad), then verily, Allaah is his Mawlaa (Lord, or Master, or Protector), and Jibreel (Gabriel), and the righteous among the believers; and furthermore, the angels are his helpers"

[al-Tahreem 66:4]

Then the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) withdrew from his wives for a month because of the secret that Hafsah had disclosed to `Aa'ishah. Al-Bukhaari, 5191. Ibn Hajar (may Allaah have mercy on him) said concerning this hadeeth: This indicates that the one who discloses a secret may be punished in a fitting manner.

In the Sunnah we find a warning against seeking out the secrets of others, and spreading secrets that should not be spread.

For example, it is strongly discouraged to seek out the faults of others. According to a hadeeth narrated from Abu Hurayrah, the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "If a man were to look into your private affairs without your permission, and you were to throw a pebble at him and put out his eye, there would be no sin on you." Al-Bukhaari, 6902; Muslim, 2158. Ibn Hajar said, commenting on this hadeeth: It is narrated by Muslim with a different isnaad from Abu Hurayrah: "Whoever looks into some people's house without their permission, it is permissible for them to put out his eye." And it was narrated with yet another isnaad from Abu Hurayrah in a version that states it even more clearly; this is narrated by Ahmad, Ibn Abi `Aasim and al-Nasaa'i, and classed as saheeh by Ibn Hibbaan and al-Bayhaqi. This version says: "Whoever looks into some people's house without their permission, and they put his eye out, there is no diyah (blood money) and no qisaas (retaliatory punishment)." And according to one report through this isnaad, "… and it is worthless."

Similarly there is the warning against the one who eavesdrops on the secrets of others. It was narrated from Ibn `Abbaas that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "Whoever eavesdrops on the conversation of other people when they do not want him (to listen), or they move away from him, molten lead will be poured into his ears on the Day of Resurrection."

Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 7042.

The warning against spreading things that it is not permissible to spread includes condemnation of the one who spread marital secrets. He is regarded as being among the most evil of people before Allaah.

It was narrated that Abu Sa'eed (may Allaah be pleased with him) said: The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "Among the most evil of people before Allaah on the Day of Resurrection will be a man who is intimate with a woman and she with him, then he spreads her secret."

Narrated by Muslim, 1437.

According to another report narrated by Muslim, 1437, "One of the greatest trusts before Allaah on the Day of Resurrection will be a man who was intimate with his wife and she with him, then he spread her secret." What is meant by "one of the greatest trusts" is one of the greatest betrayals of trust.

Among the advice given by the Arabs to new brides is: "Do not disclose his secret, for if you disclose his secret, you will make him hate you."

The secrets of the home should not be disclosed, and wise men and those who are religiously committed advise the one who knows a secret not to disclose it.

It was narrated from Thaabit that Anas said: The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) came to me when I was playing with some other boys, and greeted us with salaam, then he sent me on an errand. I was late going home to my mother, and when I came she asked, `What kept you?' I said, `The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) sent me on an errand.' She said, `What did he need?' I said, `It is a secret.' She said, `Never disclose the secret of the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) to anyone.' Anas said: `By Allaah if I were to disclose it to anyone I would have disclosed it to you, O Thaabit.'

Narrated by Muslim, 2482.

Disclosing secrets is one of the signs of hypocrisy, because it comes under the heading of betraying a trust.

It was narrated from `Abd-Allaah ibn `Amr that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "There are four qualities, whoever has all of them is a pure hypocrite, and whoever has some of them has a characteristic of hypocrisy until he gives it up: when he is entrusted with something he betrays that trust; when he speaks he lies; when he makes a promise he breaks it, and when he disputes he resorts to lies and falsehood." Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 34; Muslim, 58.

It is not a condition of a trust that the one who speaks these words must tell his listener that it is a secret that he should not tell anyone, rather it is sufficient for his manner to indicate that, such as if he takes him away from others to tell him, or when he tells him he looks around to see if anyone is listening, etc.

Al-Tirmidhi (1959) narrated from Jaabir ibn `Abd-Allaah that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "If a man tells you something then looks around, it is a trust." Classed as hasan by al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Tirmidhi.

And it says in Tuhfat al-Ahwadhi:

"Then looks around" means looking to the right and the left out of caution. "It is a trust" means it is entrusted to the one to whom he spoke, i.e., it comes under the same rulings as a trust, so he must conceal it. Ibn Raslaan said: Because his looking around is the signal to the one to whom he is speaking that he is afraid that someone may overhear him, and that he has chosen him to tell his secret to. His looking around takes the place of his saying, `Listen to this and keep quiet about it because it is a trust (or a secret).'"

And Allaah knows best.

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6418: He falsified information on his university certificate and got hired on the basis of that certificate

Question:

Someone used a forged university certificate to help him get a job. Another person used a genuine certificate but some of the details were false. A third person forged a paper required for the job, such as a certificate of experience. They worked and understood the job fully. What should these people do now that they have repented? Please note that some of the jobs are in the government sector and some are in the private sector.


Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

We put this question to Shaykh Muhammad ibn Saalih al-`Uthaymeen (may Allaah preserve him), who answered as follows:

Everything that is based on falsehood is false. These people have to repeat the exams for the certificates on which their employment is based. But if it is the case that the final certificate did not involve any deceit, although they cheated in the stages that came before it, then I hope that this will be OK.

Question: But the certificate is given on the basis of all subjects studied during the years of study.

Answer: Then it is not permissible until he repeats the exams in a proper fashion.

Question: But practically speaking, if he goes to the university and tells them, I want to repeat the exams, they will tell him that the system does not permit that.

Answer: Then let him resign from his job, then he can work at the level of the certificate where no deceit is involved, such as a high school certificate, for example.

Question: But he may say, I understand the work fully and my experience in the job qualifies me to work, even without the certificate.

Answer: Then let him approach his superiors in the department in which he works, and tell them what the situation is. If they give him permission to continue on the basis of his good performance, then I hope that that will be OK.

Sheikh Muhammed Salih Al-Munajjid (www.islam-qa.com)

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32671: Internet cafes are a hotbed of evil

Question:

What do you think of what we have seen in recent times of young men hanging around internet cafes and the evil things that go on in them? What about so called chat rooms and wasting time in them?.


Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

It is not permissible for a person to prevent himself or others from remembering Allaah. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

"And of mankind is he who purchases idle talks (i.e. music, singing) to mislead (men) from the path of Allaah"

[Luqmaan 31:6]

It is not permissible to live in places of corruption because of the spiritual harm that may affect his religious commitment.

Going to internet cafes is one of the things that divert people from the path of Allaah and make it easy to access pornographic websites. Talking to women damages religious commitment and morals, even though some of them claim to be going to these cafes for good purposes. Allaah knows who is doing evil and who is doing good, for He has insight into all His slaves.

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34222: She complained about her friend and her brother has forsaken her

Question:

I have a friend whom I have known for 18 years. One day I thought that she was speaking on the phone with a man, and I was afraid for her because she is very respectable. I told my younger brother about that, seeking his advice, but after a while I found out for sure that she was innocent, and I had been too hasty in speaking to my brother. The problem is that my brother has become suspicious of me and he can hardly bear to have anything to do with me. I do not know how to solve this problem. Do I have to offer kafaarah (expiation)? What should I do with my brother?.


Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

If you spoke about your friend out of fear for her and hoping to save her, then there is no sin on you, but you should have waited and should not have been so hasty. You do not have to offer kafaarah or do anything else, unless you got carried away in speaking about her and said something about her that she dislikes, in which case you should tell her and seek her forgiveness for backbiting about her. If she has heard what you said about her, then you have to apologize to her and ask her to forgive you. If she did not hear of what you said about her, then do not tell her, rather make a lot of du'aa' for her, pray for forgiveness, and speak well of her and mention her good points to those to whom you spoke about her. We ask Allaah to forgive us and you.

See also the answer to question no. 6308.

With regard to the problem of your brother's doubts about your behaviour, this may be solved by asking Allaah to guide him and to make him stop that. Then you should adhere to Allaah's command of hijab, lowering the gaze, and avoiding non-mahram men. Do a lot of naafil prayers and fasts, and give in charity. Try to speak to him frankly and warn him against being suspicious of you.

Undoubtedly if your brother sees that you are righteous he will no longer doubt you, and that suspicion will disappear from his heart, in sha Allaah.

And Allaah knows best.

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20744: Should she refuse marriage to someone who has a bad past?

Question:

I am a moderate muslim, I practise my faith to the best of my ability, which means no drink, smoke, drug, clubbing, freely socialising with the opposite sex... I am a stage my parents want me to get married. But I am finding it difficult to say yes to anyone of the proposals because they have all had some kind of relationship or been clubbing etc in the past.....

Most people say they have changed and so forth, but i tend to think, these actions have ramifications in the future.....


Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

Islam is all moderation. Adherence to the teachings of Islam, doing the obligatory duties and avoiding the things that are forbidden are not optional for the Muslim, because these are things that Allaah has enjoined upon him. There is so much confusion nowadays that a person who avoids some haraam things and does some obligatory duties is regarded as being over-strict and stubborn. Undoubtedly this is because the people have deviated from correct understanding of Islam and because they indukge so much in sin and neglect the obligatory duties prescribed in sharee'ah.

We appreciate your keenness to adhere to the teachings of Islam in a society such as the one in which you are living. You should note that what you are doing is an action that is beloved by Allaah and by His believing friends, and that it is something which is hated by the devils among mankind and the jinn.

Your keenness to find a righteous husband is in accordance with teachings of Islam on choosing and marrying a spouse, but you should not reject a person who is known for his good character and religious commitment because of his past. If a person has repented, his past should not be a source of shame and he should not be rejected if he comes seeking marriage. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "The one who repents from sin is like one who did not sin at all." Narrated by al-Tirmidhi and classed as hasan by al-Albaani. But if he has a past record of sin and it is not known whether he had given it up, in such a case you cannot be sure of his morals or religious commitment, so he cannot be accepted as a marriage partner.

It is not enough for a person to tell his fiancée or her guardians that he has changed and has given up the bad and immoral things that he used to do; his word cannot be accepted and believed until there is the certainty that he is telling the truth or that he has definitely given up those bad things.

Strive to choose a righteous man even if he has a past and do not reject him. Reject everyone who is known to have a bad past and has not given it up, because the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) told men: "A woman may be married for four things: her wealth, her lineage, her beauty, or her religious commitment. Choose the one who is religiously-committed, may your hands be rubbed with dust (i.e., may you prosper)." (Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 5090; Muslim, 1466).

This applies also to women, i.e., a woman should not accept anyone but a man who is religiously committed and of good character. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "If there comes to you to marry (your daughter) one who with whose religious commitment and character you are pleased, then marry (your daughter) to him, for if you do not do that, there will be fitnah (tribulation) in the land and widespread corruption." Narrated by al-Tirmidhi, 1084; classed as hasan by al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Tirmidhi, 866.

It says in Tuhfat al-Ahwadhi: The phrase "if there comes to you to marry (your daughter)" means if he comes to ask to marry a woman from among your children or relatives. "One with (whom) … you are pleased" means you think well of him, and are pleased with his religious commitment. "His character" means his attitude and how he deals and interacts with others. "Then marry (your daughter) to him, for if you do not do that" means, if you do not marry (your daughter) to one with whose religious commitment and character you are pleased, and you are only concerned with lineage, beauty and wealth, "there will be fitnah (tribulation) in the land and widespread corruption" i.e., great corruption, because if you will only marry her to someone who is wealthy or of high status, most of your womenfolk may remain without husbands, and most of your men will remain without wives, so there will be a lot of temptation to commit zina, and perhaps the guardians may feel that their honour has been violated (because of zina), so there will be a lot of tribulation and corruption, which will result in illegitimacy and a lack of righteousness and chastity.

Some of the Sahaabah were mushriks, then they entered Islam and became good Muslims, and they got married, and were not rejected because of what they had done in the past.

What matters is what a man is adhering to now, so long as he has repented from whatever he has done in the past.

We ask Allaah to make it easy for you to find a righteous husband and have righteous children.

Praise be to Allaah, the Lord of the worlds.

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37666: Attributes of the one who gains the reward for giving iftaar to one who is fasting

Question:

We know that giving iftaar to one who is fasting in Ramadaan brings a great reward, but my question is:
Who is this fasting person? Is it the one who has no food with which to break his fast? Or is it the wayfarer? Or is it any other person even if he is well off? The reason why I am asking this question is that we live in America and the members of the Muslim community here are living a life of ease, and they issue invitations in Ramadaan _ so it seems _ for the purpose of competing and showing off… (So and so is more generous than So and so, and So and so is a better cook than So and so… etc). May Allaah reward you with good.


Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

The reward for offering iftaar to one who is fasting is great as the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "Whoever gives iftaar to one who is fasting will have a reward like his, without that detracting from the reward of the fasting person in the slightest." Narrated by al-Tirmidhi, 708l classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Targheeb wa'l-Tarheeb, 1078. See also Question no. 12598.

This reward is earned by everyone who gives iftaar to one who is fasting. It is not subject to the condition that the fasting person be poor, because this is not a kind of charity, rather it is a kind of a gift, and a gift is not subject to the condition that the recipient be poor. Rather it is acceptable to give gifts to both rich and poor.

With regard to the invitations whose purpose is to compete and show off, they are something blameworthy and the one who does this will not have any reward for this action, so they are depriving themselves of a great deal of good.

The person who receives such an invitation should not attend or take part in them, rather he should excuse himself. Then if he is able to advise the one who does that, in the nicest manner that is most likely to be accepted, that is good. He should avoid speaking directly, and use subtle words and speak in general terms that are not directed at any specific person.

For kind and gentle words and good manners, and avoiding harsh words, are among the means of causing advice to be accepted. The Muslim is keen that his fellow-Muslim should accept the truth and act upon it.

The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) used to do that. Some of his companions did things that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) denounced, but he did not confront them with that, rather he would say, "What is wrong with people who do such and such…?"

This manner of speaking should achieve the desired purpose.

And Allaah knows best.

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20642: Does committing a sin openly put a person beyond the pale of Islam?

Question:

Is it kufr to commit a sin openly and discuss about sinful activities such as movies, songs etc? Does this rule apply to both major as well as minor sins? Please pay attention to this question, as a number of our brothers and sisters who have newly inclined towards Islam are facing this problem.

Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

One of the things concerning which there can be no doubt is the fact that committing acts of disobedience and major sins openly is sin upon sin which may lead a person to kufr at the time of committing that sin openly, because he takes the prohibition on that lightly and is proud of what he is doing. There is no difference between major and minor sins with regard to this ruling.

It was narrated that Abu Hurayrah said: I heard the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) say: "All of my ummah may be forgiven except those who commit sin openly. It is a kind of committing sin openly if a man does something at night, then morning comes and Allaah has concealed his sin, but he says, `O So and so, I did such and such last night,' when his Lord has concealed him (his action) all night but in the morning he reveals that which Allaah had concealed for him."

Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 5721; Muslim, 2990

Shaykh Ibn `Uthaymeen (may Allaah have mercy on him) said:

… There is a third type of immoral, prmiscuous evildoer, who speaks of zina with pride (Allaah forbid), and speaks of how he traveled to such and such a land, and committed immoral actions and adultery with a number of women, and so on, and he boasts about that.

This person should be asked to repent; if he repents all well and good, otherwise he should be executed, because if a person boasts about committing zina, this implies that he regards zina as being permissible (Allaah forbid), and whoever regards zina as permissible is a kaafir.

Sharh Riyaadh al-Saaliheen, 1/116

Undoubtedly there are varying degrees of disobedience, and the level of sin varies according to the person's state of mind whilst committing the sin and afterwards. The one who conceals his sin is not like one who commits sin openly. The one who regrets it afterwards is not like one who boasts about it.

Ibn al-Qayyim said:

In conclusion, evil actions vary according to their consequences. Those who have boyfriends or girlfriends commit a less serious sin than those who commit immoral actions with anyone; the one who commits sin in secret is doing something less serious than one who commits sin openly and broadcasts it. The one who keeps quiet about it commits a less serious sin than one who tells people about it. Such a one is far removed from the forgiveness of Allaah, as the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "All of my ummah may be forgiven except those who commit sin openly…"

Ighaathat al-Lahfaan, 2/147

The basic principle is that the Muslim should follow his sin with repentance and seeking forgiveness; he should regret what he has done and resolve never to go back to it. He should not follow it with boasting and speaking openly about it.

Ahmad (8792) and al-Tirmidhi (3334) narrated that Abu Hurayrah (may Allaah be pleased with him) said: The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "If the believer commits a sin, a black spot appears on his heart. If he repents, gives it up and seeks forgiveness, his heart is cleansed, but if he does more then (that spot) increases until it covers his heart. That is the raan (covering of sin) which Allaah mentioned in the Qur'aan:

"Nay! But on their hearts is the Raan (covering of sins and evil deeds) which they used to earn"

[al-Mutaffifeen 83:14]

Classed as hasan by al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Tirmidhi, 2654

There remains one issue that was mentioned in the question, which is the committing of sin openly by those who are new in Islam. Those people are still unaware of the rulings of Islam, so they are excused if they do not know the shar'i rulings, but they should be taught. So strive to teach them, and show them this answer.

May Allaah help us to do that which He loves and which pleases Him.

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26819: This action is reprehensible

Question:

There is a phenomenon which is widespread among some people in the Maghreb (North Africa), whereby a mother makes cuts above her daughter's knee with a razor. She makes three parallel lines, and puts a piece of sugar on the flowing blood and tells her daughter to eat it and say some words. The mother believes that this action will protect her daughter's virginity and prevent any aggressor reaching her. (And there are other ways of doing the same thing). What is the Islamic ruling on this action?.


Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

This action is reprehensible, and it is a myth that has no basis. It is not permissible to do this, rather you should refrain from it and warn others against it. The idea that it will protect the girl's virginity is false and comes from the Shaytaan; it has no basis in pure sharee'ah. So we must advise people not to do this and warn them against it. The scholars must explain that and warn against it, because they are the one who convey knowledge from Allaah and from the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him). And Allaah is the One Whose help we seek.

Majmoo' Fataawa wa Maqaalaat Mutanawwi'ah li'l-Shaykh Ibn Baaz, 6/394 (www.islam-qa.com)

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9229: Ridding oneself of arrogance

Question:

How should a person come over arrogance?.


Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

Firstly:

Arrogance is a blameworthy characteristic which is the feature of Iblees and his cohorts in this world, those on whose hearts Allaah has placed a seal.

The first one who showed arrogance towards Allaah and His creation was the accursed Iblees, when Allaah commanded him to prostrate to Adam and he refused and was arrogant, and said, "I am better than him (Adam), You created me from fire, and him You created from clay."

Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

"And surely, We created you (your father Adam) and then gave you shape (the noble shape of a human being); then We told the angels, `Prostrate yourselves to Adam', and they prostrated themselves, except Iblees (Satan), he refused to be of those who prostrated themselves.

(Allaah) said: `What prevented you (O Iblees) that you did not prostrate yourself, when I commanded you?' Iblees said: `I am better than him (Adam), You created me from fire, and him You created from clay'"

[al-A'raaf 7:11-12]

Arrogance is one of the characteristics of Iblees, so whoever wants to be arrogant should realize that he is acquiring a characteristic of the devils, and that he is not acquiring a characteristic of the noble angels who obeyed their Lord and fell down prostrate.

Moreover, arrogance may be the cause of a person being deprived of Paradise and may mean that the Lord of Glory will not even look at him, as it says in the following two ahaadeeth:

1 _ It was narrated from `Abd-Allaah ibn Mas'ood that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "No one who has an atom's-weight of arrogance in his heart will enter Paradise." A man said, "O Messenger of Allaah, what if a man likes his clothes and his shoes to look good?" He said, "Allaah is Beautiful and loves beauty. Arrogance means rejecting the truth and looking down on people."

Narrated by Muslim, 91.

2 _ It was narrated that `Abd-Allaah ibn `Umar (may Allaah be pleased with him) said: The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "Whoever lets his garment drag along the ground out of pride, Allaah will not look at him on the Day of Resurrection." Abu Bakr said: "Sometimes my garment slips down on one side, unless I pay attention to it." The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said, "You are not doing that out of pride."

Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 3465

Secondly:

Pride is an attribute that is not befitting for anyone except Allaah. Whoever seeks to compete with Allaah in that, Allaah will destroy him, wreak vengeance on him and make things difficult for him.

It was narrated that Abu Sa'eed al-Khudri and Abu Hurayrah said: The Messenger of Allaah (S) said: "Might is His garment and pride is His cloak; whoever seeks to compete with Me concerning them, I will punish him."

Narrated by Muslim, 2620.

Al-Nawawi said: This is how it is narrated in all texts. The pronoun in the words `His garment' and `His cloak' refers to Allaah, and there is something omitted; what is meant is `Allaah says, `whoever seeks to compete with Me concerning them, I will punish him'.

What is meant by `seeks to compete with Me' is seeking to acquire that characteristic in the sense of sharing in it.

This is a stern warning against arrogance which clearly demonstrates that it is haraam. Sharh Muslim, 16/173.

Everyone who tries to be arrogant and put himself above others, Allaah will bring him down among the lowest of the low, and will humiliate him, because he is going against reality, so Allaah will punish him by thwarting his aims; the punishment is to fit the crime.

The one who is arrogant towards the people will be trampled beneath the feet of the people on the Day of Resurrection, as a punishment for his arrogance.

It was narrated from `Amr ibn Shu'ayb via his father and grandfather that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "On the Day of Resurrection, the arrogant will be gathered like ants in the form of men. Humiliation will overwhelm them from all sides. They will be driven to a prison in Hell called Bawlas, with the hottest fire rising over them, and they will be given to drink of the juice of the inhabitants of Hell, which is teenat al-khabaal."

Narrated by al-Tirmidhi, 2492; classed as hasan by al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Tirmidhi, 2025.

Thirdly:

Arrogance is of several types, including the following:

1 _ When a person does not accept the truth and produces false arguments against it, as we have mentioned in the hadeeth of `Abd-Allaah ibn Mas'ood, "Arrogance means rejecting the truth and looking down on people."

2 _ When a person admires himself for his beauty or handsomeness, or the fineness of his food or clothing, so he feels proud and arrogant and feels superior to people.

It was narrated that Abu Hurayrah said: The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said (or Abu'l-Qaasim (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said): "Whilst a man was walking, dragging his garment with pride, with his hair nicely combed, Allaah caused the earth to swallow him and he will go on sinking in it until the Day of Resurrection."

Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 3297; Muslim, 2088

A similar case is the story of the friend of the man whose companion spoke to him arrogantly. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

"And he had property (or fruit) and he said to his companion, in the course of mutual talk: `I am more than you in wealth and stronger in respect of men'"
[al-Kahf 18:34]

It may be that he was boasting about his tribe and linage.

Fourthly:

One of the remedies for arrogance is to think of yourself as being just like other people and realize that they are like you, they were born from a mother and a father just as you were, and that taqwa (piety, fear of Allaah) is the true criterion of superiority.

Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

"Verily, the most honourable of you with Allaah is that (believer) who has AtTaqwa [i.e. he is one of the Muttaqoon (the pious)"

[al-Hujuraat 49:13]

The arrogant Muslim should realize that no matter what he achieves, he is still too weak to attain a stature like the mountains in height or rend nor penetrate the earth (cf. al-Isra' 17:37), as Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

"And turn not your face away from men with pride, nor walk in insolence through the earth. Verily, Allaah likes not any arrogant boaster.

And be moderate (or show no insolence) in your walking, and lower your voice. Verily, the harshest of all voices is the braying of the asses" [Luqmaan 31:18-19]

Al-Qurtubi said:

The phrase "nor walk in insolence through the earth" is a prohibition of arrogance and is enjoining humility. Marah (translated here as insolence) is excessive joy, or it was said that it means being arrogant in walking, or thinking too highly of oneself.

Qutaadah said: it means showing off in walking; or it was said that it means vanity.

All of these suggestions are close in meaning, but they may be divided into two Islam & Muslims: those which are blameworthy and those which are praiseworthy.

Arrogance, vanity, showing off and thinking too highly of oneself are blameworthy; joy and energy are praiseworthy.

Tafseer al-Qurtubi, 10/260.

Another remedy for arrogance is for a person to realize that on the Day of Resurrection he will be gathered in a small form like an ant which will be trampled underfoot. Arrogant people are hated by other people just as they are hated by Allaah; people love humble, tolerant and gentle people, and they hate those who are harsh and cruel to people.

Another remedy is to remember that he and urine came out of the same place; that he began as a despised drop of sperm and he will end up as a rotten corpse, and that in between he is a vessel for faeces. So what does he have to feel so proud and arrogant about?!

We ask Allaah to rid us all of arrogance and make us humble.

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14367: Is it permissible to steal from the kuffaar?

Question:

Is stealing from the kuffar haram if you live in a kaafir country? The person I'm thinking of is certainly not starving or in need of the things that he steals. It is also rather safe to live as a muslim in this country and the oppression is not grave.


Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

No one is unaware of the fact that stealing is a major sin, for which Allaah has enjoined the punishment of having the hand cut off. Sharee'ah makes no distinction between the wealth of a male and the wealth of a female, or between the wealth of a minor and the wealth of an adult, or between the wealth of a Muslim and the wealth of a kaafir. The only exception made by sharee'ah is the wealth of kaafirs who are waging war against the Muslims.

The Muslim should be a good example of trustworthiness, honouring agreements and good character. When Muslims have had such characteristics, this has been the cause of many kaafirs entering Islam, because they saw the beauties of Islam and the good character of its people.

The Muslim who regards the kaafirs' wealth as permissible, whether he is in a Muslim country or in a kaafir country, is doing the kaafirs a great favour and helping them to distort the image of Islam and Muslims; he is thereby helping those who are launching attacks against Islam.

When a Muslim enters a kaafir country, it is as if he entering into a peaceful agreement with them _ which is the visa which is given to him to enable him to enter their country _ so if he takes their wealth unlawfully, then he is breaking that agreement, in addition to being a thief.

The wealth that he steals from them is haraam. It was narrated that al-Mugheerah ibn Shu'bah kept company with some people during the Jaahiliyyah. He killed them and took their wealth, then he came and entered Islam. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "As for your Islam, I accept it, and as for the wealth, I have nothing to do with it." According to a report narrated by Abu Dawood, "As for your Islam, we accept it, and as for the wealth it is obtained through treachery, and we have no need of it."

(Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 2583; Abu Dawood, 2765; classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh Abi Dawood, 2403).

Al-Haafiz Ibn Hajar said:

The phrase "and as for the wealth, I have nothing to do with it" means, I will not touch it because it was obtained through treachery. What we learn from this is that it is not permissible to take the wealth of the kuffaar by treachery when they have trusted you and granted you safety, because when people accompany one another (when travelling), they do so on the basis of mutual trust, and that trust should not be betrayed, whether the other person is a Muslim or a kaafir. The wealth of the kuffaar is only permissible in the case of combat and war. Perhaps the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) let him keep the wealth in the hope that the people of its owner might become Muslim, then he could return their wealth to them.

Fath al-Baari, 5/341

Al-Shaafa'i (may Allaah have mercy on him) said: When a Muslim enters dar al-harb (the non-Muslim lands) on peaceful terms, and finds himself in position to take something of their wealth, it is not permissible for him to take it, whether it is a little or a lot, because if he is safe from them, they should be safe from him, and because it is not permissible for him to take anything from them when they have given him safety except what it is permissible for him to take from the wealth of the Muslims and ahl al-dhimmah (non-Muslims living under the protection of the Muslim state). Wealth may be forbidden for a number of reasons:

If the owner is a Muslim

if the owner is (a non-Muslim) living under the protection of the Muslim state

if the owner is one with whom there is a peace deal, until the deal expires; such people are considered to be like ahl al-dhimmah as far as the sanctity of their wealth is concerned, until the deal expires.

Al-Umm, 4/284

Al-Sarkhasi (may Allaah have mercy on him) said: It is not right for a Muslim who is on peaceful terms with them to betray them, because betrayal is haraam. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "Every betrayer will have a banner by his backside on the Day of Resurrection, by which his betrayal will be known." If he betrays them and steals their wealth, and brings it to the Muslim lands, it is not right for a Muslim to buy from him if he knows about that, because he has obtained it in an evil manner, and buying from him is encouraging him in that, which it is not right for the Muslim to do. The basic principle in this matter is the hadeeth of al-Mugheerah ibn Shu'bah (may Allaah be pleased with him), when he killed his companions and brought their wealth to Madeenah and became Muslim, and asked the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) to take the khums of his wealth, and he said, "As for your Islam, we accept it, and as for the wealth it is obtained through treachery, and we have no need of it."

Al-Mabsoot, 10/96

And Allaah knows best.

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20068: He is homosexual and wants a remedy

Question:

I am muslim 16 year old boy.i pray and fast regularly,i am straight but the problem is that i am homosexual, i first was thinking of my father , i think i became homosexual genetically, i see usually bad pictures, but i want to give up, i never done any sex in my life, i really am afraid of god, and i always pray for him to help me.
please sir, i beg you, tell me how practically can i get rid of this nasty desire.


Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

we ask Allaah to heal you quickly from this serious disease, and to cleanse your heart of all evil, for He is Able to do that. For the harm caused by falling into this great sin is not limited to punishment in the Hereafter, rather it goes beyond that and a part of the punishment may happen in this world; even if it is nothing more than the regret and feelings of guilt that result from it, that is enough, so how about if that is accompanied by incurable fatal diseases which the doctors are agreed are widespread among homosexuals and are caused by these perverted practices? You may find more information on that if you refer to question no. 10050.

The way to deal with your problem is as follows:

Firstly:

You have to repent sincerely from your heart, turn to Allaah, regret what you have done, and pray a great deal to Allaah, asking Him to forgive you and help you to get rid of this problem. For Allaah is most Generous and is Close and always Responsive. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

"Say: `O `Ibaadi (My slaves) who have transgressed against themselves (by committing evil deeds and sins)! Despair not of the Mercy of Allaah, verily, Allaah forgives all sins. Truly, He is OftForgiving, Most Merciful'"

[al-Zumar 39:53]

So stand before Allaah weeping, beseeching, expressing your need for Him and seeking His forgiveness, and receive the glad tidings from Allaah of a way out and forgiveness.

Secondly:

Strive to plant the seeds of faith in your heart, for when they grow they will bear fruits of happiness in this world and in the Hereafter.

Faith in Allaah is what _ after the help of Allaah _ protects a person from falling into haraam things. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "No adulterer is a believer at the moment when he is committing adultery." (Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 2475; Muslim, 57). So when faith is well established in your heart and fills your heart and emotions, you will not violate His sacred limits, in sha Allaah. If the believer stumbles on one occasion he will quickly wake up. Allaah describes His slaves as follows (interpretation of the meaning):

"Verily, those who are Al-Muttaqoon (the pious), when an evil thought comes to them from Shaytaan (Satan), they remember (Allaah), and (indeed) they then see (aright)"

[al-A'raaf 7:201]

Thirdly:

Try to follow the advice which the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) gave to young people, which is to get married if you are able to. Do not pay any attention to the fact that you are young, for being young is not a reason not to get married, far from it, so long as you have the need to get married. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "O young men, whoever among you can afford to get married, let him do so, for it is more effective in lowering the gaze and protecting chastity. Whoever cannot afford that should fast, for it will be a shield for him." (Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 5065; Muslim, 1400). Strive to follow this advice from the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him), for this is the solution to your problem, in sha Allaah.

There is nothing wrong with telling your father and mother of your need and desire to get married; don't let shyness stop you from doing that.

Think seriously about marriage and do not fear poverty, and Allaah will grant you independence of means by His bounty. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

"And marry those among you who are single (i.e. a man who has no wife and the woman who has no husband) and (also marry) the Saalihoon (pious, fit and capable ones) of your (male) slaves and maidservants (female slaves). If they be poor, Allaah will enrich them out of His Bounty. And Allaah is AllSufficient for His creatures' needs, AllKnowing (about the state of the people)"

[al-Noor 24:32]

The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) has told us that the one who gets married with a good intention, Allaah will help him. It was narrated from Abu Hurayrah (may Allaah be pleased with him) that the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "There are three who are entitled to Allaah's help: the mujaahid who fights for the sake of Allaah, the slave who made a contract of manumission with his master, wanting to buy his freedom, and the one who gets married, seeking chastity."

(Narrated by al-Tirmidhi, 1655; al-Nasaa'i, 3120; Ibn Maajah, 2518; classed as hasan by al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Targheeb wa'l-Tarheeb, 1917).

Fourthly:

If it is not easy for you to get married, then there is another solution, which is fasting. So why not think of fasting three days of each month, or on Mondays and Thursdays?

How great is the reward of fasting. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said that Allaah said, "All the deeds of the son of Adam are for him except for fasting, which is for Me and I shall give reward for it." (Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 1904; Muslim 1151).

And Allaah tells us that He has enjoined fasting on us so that we might become pious:

"O you who believe! Observing As-Sawm (the fasting) is prescribed for you as it was prescribed for those before you, that you may become Al-Muttaqoon (the pious)"

[al-Baqarah 2:183]

Fasting _ as well as offering protection from following whims and desires and bringing a great reward from Allaah _ also trains a person to have strong will, patience and forbearance, to rise above the desires and pleasures of the self. So hasten to fast so that Allaah may make things easier for you.

Fifthly:

Beware of thinking little of looking at haraam things in cheap magazines and nude pictures which lead to committing immoral actions that doom a person to Hell, and have deep and bad effects on the heart _ Allaah forbid. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

"Tell the believing men to lower their gaze (from looking at forbidden things), and protect their private parts (from illegal sexual acts). That is purer for them. Verily, Allaah is AllAware of what they do"

[al-Noor 24:30]

You should note that if you think little of this evil, this gives the Shaytaan an opportunity to make other actions that lie beyond that seem attractive to you, which is obvious. But he will do that because you gave in to him, even if that only happened once.

Sixthly:

Remember, when the idea of sin come to you, or the Shaytaan whispers to you to commit a sin, that the parts of your body will bear witness against you on the Day of Resurrection for this sin. Do you not know that these limbs and this youthful energy are a blessing from Allaah to you? So can it be an act of gratitude to Allaah that you use them to disobey Allaah and rebel against the commands of Allaah?

There is another matter which you should pay attention to. Read with me the following verse (interpretation of the meaning):

"Till, when they reach it (Hellfire), their hearing (ears) and their eyes and their skins will testify against them as to what they used to do.

And they will say to their skins, `Why do you testify against us?' They will say: `Allaah has caused us to speak.' He causes all things to speak, and He created you the first time, and to Him you are made to return"
[Fussilat 41:20-21]

It was narrated that Anas ibn Maalik said: "We were with the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) and he smiled and said, `Do you know why I am smiling?' We said, `Allaah and His Messenger know best.' He said, `Because of how a person will address his Lord. He will say, `O Lord, did You not guarantee me protection against injustice?' He will say, `Yes.' He will say, `I do not deem valid any witness against me but my own self.' Allaah will say, `Your own self will be sufficient as a witness against you this Day, and the honourable scribes (recording angels) will also bear witness.' Then a seal will be placed over his mouth and it will be said to his limbs, `Speak!' And they will speak of his deeds. Then he will be allowed to speak and will say, `Away with you! It was for your sake that I argued.'" (Narrated by Muslim, 2969).

Seventhly:

Avoid being alone, for this makes you think about your desires. Try to fill your time with things that will benefit you, such as doing righteous deeds, reading Qur'aan, dhikr and prayer.

Eighthly:

Avoid keeping company with evil and immoral people who discuss these subjects, talk about things that provoke desire, take the matter of sin lightly and encourage it. You have to look for good friends who will remind you of Allaah and help you to obey Him. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said, "A man will follow the religion of his close friend, so be careful about who you make friends with." (Narrated by al-Tirmidhi, 2378; classed as hasan by al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Tirmidhi, 1937).

Ninthly:

If it so happens that you fall into sin in a moment of weakness, do not persist in that, rather be quick to repent to Allaah, lest you become one of those of whom Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

"And those who, when they have committed Faahishah (illegal sexual intercourse) or wronged themselves with evil, remember Allaah and ask forgiveness for their sins; — and none can forgive sins but Allaah — and do not persist in what (wrong) they have done, while they know"

[Aal `Imraan 3:135]

My brother, do not despair of the mercy of Allaah. Beware of letting the Shaytaan have any power over you or letting him whisper to you that Allaah will never forgive you. For Allaah forgives all sins of those who repent to Him.

I hope that Allaah will help you and will make it easy for you to get out of this problem.

For more information on this topic I advise you to read the booklet Kayfa tawaajih al-shahwah: hadeeth ila al-shabaab wa'l-fatayaat. Islam Q&A (www.islam-qa.com)

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7545: He has repented from stealing from the kuffaar

Question:

I live in a non-muslim country and for a long time was committing many sins, but, alhamdu_lillah who has guided me to his straight path I have repented. However, before I repented I use to do things such as steal from shops, cheat the government for social security money, take public transport without paying and things of that nature (may Allah forgive me). If I inform the authority of these things I will be imprisoned in non-muslim environment! please tell me what I should do! and please ask Allah to forgive me.


Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

Praise be to Allaah Who has honoured you by enabling you to repent, We ask Allaah to guide us all to the Straight Path and to make us steadfast in following it until death.

You should note that it is not permissible for the Muslims to cheat anyone and take his money unlawfully, even if he is a kaafir.

If the Muslim commits any sin, whether stealing or anything else, then repents before the matter is referred to the judge, then he is spared the punishment in that case, and it is not permissible to punish him, because Allaah says concerning banditry (interpretation of the meaning):

"The recompense of those who wage war against Allaah and His Messenger and do mischief in the land is only that they shall be killed or crucified or their hands and their feet be cut off from opposite sides, or be exiled from the land. That is their disgrace in this world, and a great torment is theirs in the Hereafter.

Except for those who (having fled away and then) came back (as Muslims) with repentance before they fall into your power; in that case, know that Allaah is OftForgiving, Most Merciful"

[al-Maa'idah 5:33-34]

And the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "The one who repents from sin is like one who never sinned." And the one who did not sin cannot be punished.

Al-Ikhtiyaaraat al-Fiqhiyyah, p. 510-526; al-Mughni, 12/484

It was narrated from `Abd-Allaah ibn `Umar (may Allaah be pleased with them both) that the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said, after al-Aslami had been stoned, "Avoid these immoral actions that Allaah has forbidden. Whoever does any of them, let him conceal that which Allaah has concealed, and let him repent to Allaah, for whoever tells us what he has done, we will carry out the ruling mentioned in the Book of Allaah on him." (Narrated by al-Haakim in al-Mustadrak `ala'l-Saheehayn, 4/425; al-Bayhaqi, 8/330. This hadeeth was classed as saheeh by al-Haakim, Ibn al-Sakan and Ibn al-Mulaqqin).

See al-Talkhees al-Habeer, 4/57; Khalaasat al-Badr al-Muneer, by Ibn al-Mulaqqin, 2/303.

Based on this, you do not have to go to the authorities and tell them about your stealing, rather it is sufficient for you to repent sincerely. But you have to return the money to its owners, because your repentance is not valid otherwise. You do not have to tell them that this is money that you stole from them, especially if you are afraid that they will put you in prison. What matters is returning the money etc to its owners. So you could put it in an envelope, or give it to someone who will give it to them, etc.

You must also return the government's money, and the money of other people. If you do not know exactly how much the money was, then estimate what you think is most likely, i.e., pay until you are sure that you have done what you must do.

If you do not know who the owners of the money are, then you can give it in charity on their behalf.

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8529: What is the ruling on one person saying to another "Eat air (i.e., shut up)" as a put-down?

Question:

What is the ruling on one person saying to another "Eat air (i.e., shut up)" as an insult or put-down to the other person?.

Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

Making fun of people and insulting them is something that the Muslim should be above doing. It is one of the things that Allaah has forbidden the believers to do because it generates resentment and hatred among the Muslims, and because it stems from arrogance and feelings of superiority on the part of the one who is mocking and insulting the other. There are strong warnings issued to those who are arrogant and look down on people.

It was narrated from Ibn Mas'ood that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "No one in whose heart is a mustard seed's worth of pride will enter Paradise." A man said, "What if a man likes his clothes and his shoes to look good?" He said, `Allaah is Beautiful and loves beauty. Pride means disdaining the truth and looking at people with contempt."

(Narrated by Muslim, 9)

One of the qualities of the Muslim is that the Muslims are safe from his words and his actions.

It was narrated from `Abd-Allaah ibn `Amr ibn al-`Aas that a man asked the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) which of the Muslims was best? He said, "The one from whose words and actions the Muslims are safe." (Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 10; Muslim, 40).

The phrase which the questioner asked about does not involve anything that is haraam in sharee'ah as far as the words themselves are concerned, but we wish that they were not uttered by a Muslim because of what they imply and because of the resentment and hatred that they may lead to.

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26964: Prohibition against spying on others

Question:

I work for a company and my boss has asked me to tell him what the employees are saying about him personally, despite the fact that some of what they are saying is true. Is the money that I receive in return for this spying halaal or haraam?


Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

It is not permissible for you to do this haraam action, because it involves nameemah (malicious gossip) and spying, and the reward you receive for this is haraam earnings.

You should note that nameemah is a major sin. Nameemah means telling some people what others have said about them in order to cause trouble among them. This is the most common definition of nameemah. Ibn Hajar al-Haythami narrated it in his book al-Zawaajir `an Iqtiraaf al-Kabaa'ir, then he said: "It says in al-Ihya': it is not limited to that, rather it refers to disclosure of anything that may hurt or offend somebody if it is disclosed, whether it is the person who is spoken about who is offended, or the person who hears the gossip, or a third party, whether it is disclosed verbally, in writing or by means of a hint or a gesture, and whether what is transmitted is an action, a word, a fault or a shortcoming in the person who is being talked about, or in someone else. The definition of nameemah is uncovering secrets and disclosing that which it is not appropriate to disclose. Hence we should keep silent and refrain from telling everything that we see of people's situations, unless speaking of it will bring some benefit to a Muslim or ward off some harm. For example, if you see a person taking someone else's property, you have to bear witness to that, in contrast to if you see someone hiding his own money, in which case speaking of it would be nameemah and disclosing a person's secrets. If what is spoken of is a fault or shortcoming in the person of whom one speaks, then this is gheebah (backbiting) and nameemah (malicious gossip)."

(al-Zawaajir, no. 252: al-Nameemah)

It was narrated that al-Haafiz al-Mundhiri said: "The ummah is unanimously agreed that nameemah is forbidden and that it is one of the greatest sins in the sight of Allaah."

From this we know that your passing on to your boss what your colleagues say is a kind of disclosing secrets and creating mischief and falling into this major sin, in addition to it being spying, which is haraam.

There are many texts which condemn nameemah and spying and seeking out people's faults, which will deter the Muslim from committing these haraam actions:

1 _ The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "No person who spreads nameemah will enter Paradise." According to another report, "No eavesdropper (qattaat)…" Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 6056; Muslim, 105.

A qattaat is someone who spreads nameemah. It was said that the one who spreads nameemah is the person who is with a group who are speaking, then he spreads gossip about them, and that the qattaat is the one who listens to them without them realizing, then he spreads gossip about them.

2 _ In al-Saheehayn it is narrated that Ibn `Abbaas said: "The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) out of one of the gardens of Madeenah, and he heard the sounds of two people who were being tormented in their graves. He said, `They are being punished, not for something that was difficult to avoid, but it is nevertheless a major sin. One of them did not protect himself from urine (i.e., take measures to avoid contaminating himself or his clothes) and the other used to walk about spreading nameemah.'"

(al-Bukhaari, 216; Muslim, 292).

3 _ It is also narrated in al-Saheehayn from Abu Hurayrah that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: `Beware of suspicion, for suspicion is the falsest of speech. Do not eavesdrop; do not spy on one another; do not envy one another; do not forsake one another; do not hate one another. Be, O slaves of Allaah, brothers."

Al-Bukhaari, 5144; Muslim, 2563.

Al-Nawawi (may Allaah have mercy on him) said: "Some of the scholars said that tahassus [`eavesdropping'] means listening to other people's conversations, and tajassus [`spying'] means seeking out their faults. Or it was suggested that tajassus means looking for secrets. The word is mostly used in the sense of evil. The jaasoos (spy) is the one who seeks out secrets for evil purposes and the naamoos is the one who seeks out secrets for good purposes. And it was said that tajassus means looking for information for someone else, and tahassus means looking for information for oneself. This was the view of Tha'lab. And it was said that they mean one and the same, which is seeking out information about people's circumstances."

4 _ al-Bukhaari (7042) narrated from Ibn `Abbaas that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "Whoever speaks of a dream that he did not actually see will be ordered [on the Day of Judgement] to tie two grains of barley together, and he will never be able to do so. Whoever listens in on other people's conversations when they do not like that will have molten lead poured into his ears on the Day of Resurrection. Whoever makes an image will be punished and will be ordered to breath life into it, and he will not be able to do so."

5 _ Ahmad (19277) and Abu Dawood (4880) narrated that Abu Barzah al-Aslami said: "The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: `O you who have spoken the words of faith but faith has not truly entered your hearts! Do not backbite about the Muslims, and do not seek out their faults. For whoever seeks out their faults, Allaah will seek out his faults, and if Allaah seeks out a person's faults He will expose him even in his own house.'"

Classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh Abi Dawood, 4083.

We do not think that a believer would read these great ahaadeeth and then volunteer to spy on his fellow-Muslims, or seek out their faults, or spread nameemah among them. We think that you are one of those who will benefit from this and pay attention, in sha Allaah. Hence we say that you must refuse to do this task, no matter what encouragement or threats you may receive, whilst also advising your colleagues to stop gossiping about their boss and telling them off for doing so.

You should also advise your boss to stop spying on his employees and not be suspicious about them, because that will corrupt them and make them lose trust, as the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "If you seek out people's faults you will corrupt them or almost corrupt them."

Narrated by Abu Dawood, 4888; classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh Abi Dawood, 4088.

We will conclude with a few points about the attitude of the Muslim towards nameemah or malicious gossip when it is passed on to him.

Ibn Hajar al-Haythami said in his book al-Zawaajir `an Iqtiraaf al-Kabaa'ir:

"The person who hears some malicious gossip, such as being told `So and so said this about you' or `he did this to you,' must do six things:

1 _ He should not believe it, because the one who spreads nameemah is a faasiq (evildoer) according to scholarly consensus, and Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

"If a Faasiq (liar — evil person) comes to you with any news, verify it, lest you should harm people in ignorance, and afterwards you become regretful for what you have done"

[al-Hujuraat 49:6]

2 _ He should tell him not to repeat this evil action, which is evil in both religious and worldly terms.

3 _ He should hate him for the sake of Allaah if he shows no sign of repenting.

4 _ He should not think badly of the one of whom it was said, because he does not know whether that person really said it or did it.

5 _ What he has been told should not make him spy on others or look for their faults for the purpose of verifying what was said, because Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

"Avoid much suspicion; indeed some suspicions are sins. And spy not…"

[al-Hujuraat 49:12]

6 _ He should not approve for himself that which he has told the other person not to do, so he should not pass on the malicious gossip and say, `So and so told me this,' otherwise he will also be gossiping and backbiting, and he will be doing that which he told someone else not to do.

`Umar ibn `Abd al-`Azeez (may Allaah be pleased with him) said to someone who passed on some malicious gossip to him: "If you wish, we can look into the matter. If you are lying, you will be one of the people mentioned in the verse `If a Faasiq (liar — evil person) comes to you with any news' [al-Hujuraat 49:6 _ interpretation of the meaning]; and if you are telling the truth, you will be one of the people mentioned in the verse, `A slanderer, going about with calumnies' [al-Qalam 68:11 _ interpretation of the meaning]. Or if you wish, we will forgive you." He said, "Forgive me, O Ameer al-Mu'mineen, I will never do it again."

The caliph Sulaymaan ibn `Abd al-Malik rebuked someone who had spread nameemah about him, in the presence of al-Zuhri. The man denied that and Sulaymaan said to him, "The one who told me about it is one who does not tell lies." Al-Zuhri said: "The one who spreads nameemah (malicious gossip) cannot be truthful." Sulaymaan said, "You are right," and he let the man go in peace.

Al-Hasan said: "The one who tells malicious gossip to you will tell malicious gossip about you. This indicates that the person who spreads malicious gossip should be hated and not believed or trusted. How can he not be hated when he persists in lying, backbiting, slandering, betraying, deceiving, envying, spreading mischief among the people and cheating? He is one of those who try to sever the ties which Allaah has commanded must be upheld and who spread mischief on earth. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

`The way (of blame) is only against those who oppress men and rebel in the earth without justification; for such there will be a painful torment'

[al-Shoora 42:42]

- and the one who spreads malicious gossip is one of them."

And Allaah knows best.

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26197: Misfortune of a wife whose husband is committing sodomy

Question:

I found out that my husband is committing sodomy with a boy who comes to him, but not all the time. He has been hiding this from us and he does not know that I know. What should I do? Please advise me, may Allaah reward you. Please note that I am not falling short with regard to my duties towards him.

He is 40 years old, he is not young, and as far as other people can see, he prays regularly. This problem has been going on for two years but I only found out recently.


Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

Truly, to Allaah we belong and truly, to Him we shall return. There is no power and no strength except with Allaah, the Exalted, the Almighty! A married man committing sodomy! By Allaah, this is the essence of corruption of man's nature, absence of faith, lack of shyness, and lack of awareness that the Lord of the Worlds is always watching.

Your husband is cursed by Allaah, because the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "Cursed is the one who does the action of the people of Loot." (Narrated by Ahmad, 1878; classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Jaami', 5891).

Your husband has committed a great sin, from which he must repent before death comes to him and he is subject to the wrath and vengeance of Allaah and loss in this world and in the Hereafter. See question no. 10050.

You have to advise him, after being certain that he has indeed done this, and remind him that Allaah is always watching him and that the Shaytaan is keen to mislead him, so that perhaps he may stop committing this sin. We ask Allaah to keep you safe and sound.

Then remind him that one day he will be a father _ would he like anyone to commit this sin against his children?!

Homosexuality brings disasters to the one who does it, and it causes diseases from which few of those who commit this abhorrent evil action ever escape. It causes distress, anxiety and a sense of alienation in the one who does it and the one to whom it is done.

Also, it darkens the face, causes distress, erases light from the face, and makes the face grim, and anyone who has the slightest insight can recognize it.

Also, it inevitably leads to alienation, intense hatred and cutting off of ties between the one who does it and the one to whom it is done.

Also, it wrecks the lives of the one who does it and the one to whom it is done, in such a way that there is hardly any hope that matters can be put right, unless Allaah wills that they should repent sincerely.

Also, it takes away all good things from them, leaving them with the opposite, and it takes away all love and friendship between them, leaving them instead hating and cursing one another.

It is one of the greatest causes of blessings being lost and of the wrath of Allaah. For it inevitably leads to the curse and wrath of Allaah, and His turning away from the one who does it and not looking at him. What good can he hope for after that, and what evil can he be safe from?

What kind of life can a person have who is subject to the curse and wrath of Allaah, from whom Allaah has turned away His face and will not look at him?

Also, it destroys modesty in general, meaning the modesty which is the life of the heart. When the sense of modesty is lost, ugly things appear beautiful and beautiful things appear ugly. At that point corruption takes over.

Also, it generates insolence and impudence like nothing else can.

Also, it generates contempt, scorn and disdain like nothing else can.

And it leads to a person being hated, despised and looked down upon by people, and regarded as beneath contempt, as we seen in real life.

(From the words of Ibn al-Qayyim in Zaad al-Ma'aad, 4/263)

Modern medical studies have proven that this action causes a great deal of damage in the psyche, minds and bodies of those who commit it. The damage that it does includes the following:

Its effects on the nerves, brain, reproductive organs, viral infection of the liver. It leads to many serious homosexual diseases, such as syphilis, gonorrhoea, herpes and AIDS. We ask Allaah to keep us safe and sound.

So you have to remind him of this serious damage. But if he does not stop this sin and give up this evil action, then warn him that you will demand a divorce, and that may make him stop. Note that living with this man _ if he does not stop what he is doing _ will result you and your children also being exposed to punishment, and you may also contract a disease that he has gotten as a result of his perverse actions. We ask Allaah to make things easy for you and to guide your husband. Ameen.

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13217: A woman who is extremely shy is sitting in a place where people are backbiting _ is there any sin on her?

Question:

I am a girl who hates backbiting and malicious gossip. Sometimes I find myself in the midst of a group of people who are talking about people, and they engage in backbiting and malicious gossip. I myself loathe and detest this, but I am extremely shy and I cannot tell them not to do that, and there is no place where I can keep away from them. Allaah knows that I wish they would talk about something else. Is there any sin on me for sitting with them? What should I do?


Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

There is sin on you in that case, unless you speak out against the evil action. If they accept that from you, then praise be to Allaah, otherwise you must leave them and not sit with them, because Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

"And when you (Muhammad) see those who engage in a false conversation about Our Verses (of the Qur'aan) by mocking at them, stay away from them till they turn to another topic. And if Shaytaan (Satan) causes you to forget, then after the remembrance sit not you in the company of those people who are the Zaalimoon (polytheists and wrongdoers)"

[al-An'aam 6:68]

"And it has already been revealed to you in the Book (this Qur'aan) that when you hear the Verses of Allaah being denied and mocked at, then sit not with them, until they engage in a talk other than that; (but if you stayed with them) certainly in that case you would be like them" [al-Nisa' 4:140]

And the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "Whoever among you sees an evil action, then let him change it with his hand (by taking action against it); if he cannot, then with his tongue (by speaking out against it); and if he cannot, then with his heart (by hating it and believing it to be wrong), and that is the weakest of faith." (Narrated by Imam Muslim in his Saheeh). And there are many similar aayahs and ahaadeeth.

Fataawa al-Shaykh ibn Baaz in al-Fataawa al-Jaami'ah li'l-Mar'ah al-Muslimah, p. 1012 (www.islam-qa.com)

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22845: The phenomenon of cheating

Question:

The phenomenon of cheating is widespread in society. What is the attitude of Islam towards this phenomenon?


Answer:

In the Qur'aan, Allaah has condemned cheating and the people who do it, and has warned them of bad consequences. This may be understood from the words (interpretation of the meaning):

"Woe to AlMutaffifoon (those who give less in measure and weight).

Those who, when they have to receive by measure from men, demand full measure,

And when they have to give by measure or weight to (other) men, give less than due" [al-Mutaffifeen 83:1]

This is a severe warning to those who cheat (by giving less) in weights and measures, so how about those who steal, embezzle and withhold from the people the things that are their due? These are more deserving of the warning than those who cheat in weights and measures.

The Prophet of Allaah Shu'ayb warned his people against reducing the value of people's property and cheating in weights and measures, as Allaah has told us in the Qur'aan.

Similarly the Prophet SAWS (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) cautioned us against cheating and issued a warning to the one who does this. The Prophet SAWS (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) passed by a pile of food and put his hand into it, and his fingers touched something wet. He said, "What is this, O seller of the food?" The man said, "It got rained on, O Messenger of Allaah." He said, "Why did you not put it (the wet part) on top of the pile so that the people could see it? He who deceives does not belong to me." According to other reports, "He who deceives us is not one of us," or, "He is not one of us who deceives us." (Narrated by Muslim).

The wording of the version narrated by al-Nawawi, "he is not one of us", is sufficient warning against cheating and sufficient deterrent against indulging in this heinous sin.

We need desperately to instill this message in our hearts so that we might stir the conscience and be aware that Allaah is watching all that we do, without the need for any human supervisor.

The way we deal with this phenomenon and other destructive phenomena that exist in society should not be like a patient who has a problem in his appendix and needs surgery, but instead they heat up a poultice for him and put it on that spot to relieve the pain… for then the patient will die before they even think of calling the doctor.

Here we will examine the phenomenon of cheating, now that you know the warnings that apply to it.

Definition of cheating:

Al-Mannaawi said: Cheating is that which mixes bad with good.

Ibn Hajar al-Haythami said: the forbidden type of cheating is when the owner of the goods knows something which, if the would-be purchaser knew about it, he would not pay that amount of money for it.

Al-Kafawi said: cheating causes blackness of the heart and frowning on the face, hence this word (ghish = cheating or deceit) is also used (in Arabic) to refer to hatred or enmity.

Where cheating takes place:

The one who thinks about what happens in real life will find that many people engage in some form of cheating in all areas of their lives. Examples of that include:

1 _ Cheating in buying and selling:

How often this happens nowadays in the marketplaces of the Muslims! It may take the form of concealing faults in goods or other ways such as deceiving people about the quality of a product, or its components, quantity, weight, essential features or source.

These are some of the ways in which that cheating is manifested:

1- Some fruit-sellers put a lot of leaves or papers in the bottom of the basket of fruit, then they put the best fruit at the top. In this manner they deceive the purchaser and cheat him by making him think that the basket is full from top to bottom, and that all the fruit is of the same quality as that which he sees on the top.

2- Some of them get food oil and mix it with perfume, with the larger proportion being of oil. Then they put it in glass bottles, and this substance smells like perfume, and they sell it for a low price.

3- Some traders buy a product in a very light wrapper, then they put it in a much thicker wrapper, maybe five times thicker. Then they sell the wrapper and its contents, weighing the whole lot and charging for both the wrapper and the contents.

4- Some traders do some light mending on clothes, then they sell them without explaining that they have been mended, rather they swear by Allaah that they are new _ may they perish!

5- Some of them may wear a garment until it loses its value, then they shorten it and put some starch in it, to make people think that it is new, and they sell it as if it is new.

6- Some perfume-sellers put some products, such as saffron, near water so that they may absorb the moisture, thus increasing the weight by approximately one-third.

7- Some vendors and shopkeepers make their stores very dark by using coloured lights, so that rough products will look smooth and ugly ones will look beautiful. The Shaytaan makes their evil deeds attractive to them.

8- Some goldsmiths mix gold with copper and the like, then they sell it as if it is pure gold.

9- Some of them buy clean second-hand gold, then they offer it for sale at the price of new without telling the purchaser that it is second-hand.

10-Some vendors at car auctions put thick oil in the car engine so that the purchaser will think that it is in good condition.

11-Some of them turn back the odometer, if it shows that the car has traveled a great distance, to trick the purchaser into thinking that the car has only been used a little.

12-Some of them, if they have a car that they want to sell and they know that it has a hidden fault, will say to the one who wants to buy it, "Try this car if you want to buy it," without telling him anything about it. By Allaah, this is cheating and deceit.

13-Some of them describe many faults in the car which are not real, with the intention of concealing the real faults of the vehicle behind these imaginary faults.

Even worse than that is when they do not mention the faults until after the sale has been made and the deposit paid, and the purchaser is not able to inspect the car and is not allowed to do so.

14-Some of them, if they have a car that they want to sell, will praise it and swear by Allaah that it is good, and they will fabricate reasons why they want to sell it, but Allaah knows all secrets and that which is yet more hidden.

15-Some of them agree with their friends to increase the price so that someone else will take it. This is the najsh (artificial inflation of prices) which the Messenger of Allaah SAWS (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) forbade.

16-Another kind of cheating in selling is when butchers inflate the animal carcass that they want to sell so that the purchaser will think that it is all meat.

17-Some vendors at sheep auctions and places where chickens are sold feed the animals salt [to make them drink more and thus look fatter], so that the purchaser will think that they are fat when they are not.

18-Some owners of cattle etc. tie up the teats of milking-animals a few days before selling them so that this will look like milk when it is not.

19-

20-

I leave it for you to add more examples of cheating in buying and selling that may cross your mind. May Allaah protect you, if you are a seller or a buyer, from cheating or doing any of the things described above.

2 _ Cheating in matters of marriage

These are some of the ways in which this cheating is manifested:

1- Some fathers may offer a man who comes to marry one of his daughters his youngest daughter who is still a virgin, then on the wedding night he finds out that he has been given the older, previously-married daughter. Some men can find no escape and no way out from such a marriage.

2- Some fathers and guardians of women show the suitor the daughter who is beautiful, then on the wedding night he finds out that he has been given a different daughter who is ugly, but he has no choice but to accept the situation.

3- Some fathers may conceal some sickness or fault that may be present in the daughter, not telling the suitor so that he may have a clear picture. Then when he goes in unto her on the wedding night he discovers the sickness or fault.

4- Some fathers and guardians of women, if the suitor asks to see the woman _ which is permissible so long as the conditions stipulated in Islam are met _ give him permission to do so after they fill her face will all kinds of colours and dyes, i.e. "make-up", so that she will appear beautiful to him, but if he looked at her without that mask of make-up he would not be pleased with her. Is this not cheating which leads to great corruption of the rights of both husband and wife?

5- Some guardians marry off the female under their care without making the effort to find out about the suitor and how religiously committed he is or what his attitude is like. This is a kind of cheating and wrongdoing against the wife.

6- Another kind of cheating in marriage is when the suitor pretends to have what he does not, to make it appear that he is a man of status and that he owns a lot of real estate and cars. He may even go to the extent of hiring a luxury car, spending hundreds of riyals, to give the impression that he owns it, when in fact he does not own anything.

7- Another kind of cheating is when some people praise the suitor before the people whose daughter he wishes to marry, speaking of him in the highest terms and describing him as one who prays and is righteous, even though this suitor does not even know the way to the mosque.

Enough of this cheating and deception which destroys homes and breaks up families!

8- A form of cheating done by some women _ especially those who are older _ is when they file their teeth to create nice-looking gaps between them, thus making an older woman look young, so that the suitor will think that she is young, then when he marries her he discovers that she is very old. The Prophet SAWS (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) cursed the women who file their teeth for the purpose of beauty and alter the creation of Allaah.

3 _ Cheating in naseehah (sincere advice)

The whole point of giving advice is to help a person meet his worldly objectives or his religious objectives. One of the mutual rights of brotherhood among the believers is to be sincere towards one another, and the hypocrites are cheats.

The believer is the mirror of his brother, so if he sees some fault in him he should correct it. Sincerity means refraining from harming the Muslims, teaching them about matters of their religion of which they are unaware, and helping them to adhere to it in word and in deed, covering their faults, filling their gaps, warding off harm from them, bringing things that will benefit them, enjoining what is good upon them and forbidding what is evil in a kind and sincere manner, showing compassion towards them, respecting their elders, being merciful towards their young, giving them good advice and choosing the appropriate time for doing so, loving for them what one loves for oneself of goodness and hating for them what one hates for oneself of disliked things.

Al-Haafiz Abu'l-Qaasim al-Tabaraani narrated with his isnaad that Jareer ibn `Abd-Allaah al-Bajali (may Allaah be pleased with him) commanded his freed slave to buy a horse for him. So he bought him a horse for three hundred dirhams, and he brought the horse and its owner to him so that he could pay him the money. Jareer said to the owner of the horse _ look at this sincerity _ "Your horse is worth more than three hundred dirhams. Will you sell it for four hundred dirhams?" He said, "Yes, O Abu `Abd-Allaah."

He said, "Your horse is worth more than four hundred dirhams. Will you sell it for five hundred dirhams?" He kept increasing it by one hundred each time, with the owner agreeing and Jareer saying, "Your horse is worth more than that," until he reached eight hundred, for which price he bought it. And he said concerning that, "I gave my oath of allegiance (bay'ah) to the Messenger of Allaah SAWS (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) that I would be sincere towards every Muslim."

4 _ Cheating in positions of authority

It was narrated that Ma'qal ibn Yassaar al-Muzani (may Allaah be pleased with him) said during his final illness: "I heard the Messenger of Allaah SAWS (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) say: `There is no person whom Allaah has put in a position of authority and he dies on the day he dies cheating those under his authority, but Allaah will forbid Paradise for him.'" This was narrated by al-Bukhaari and Muslim; this version was narrated by Muslim. According to one of the two versions narrated by al-Bukhaari: "There is no Muslim whom Allaah places in a position of authority over people and he is not sincere towards them, but he will not smell the fragrance of Paradise."

This is a stern warning which includes everyone whom Allaah has placed in a position of authority, whether great or small, starting from the individuals of a royal family. Everyone must be sincere towards those who are under their authority, and not cheat or deceive them.

So an employee must be sincere in his work and do it in the manner required by sharee'ah, without cheating or deceiving anyone, and without delaying work for people. He should realize that he will stand before Allaah and that Allaah has only given him this job so that he can be sincere towards the Muslims.

Similarly a father must be sincere towards his children and not neglect their upbringing, rather he must do all that he can to save himself and his children from a Fire (Hell) whose fuel is men and stones, over which are appointed angels stern and severe (cf. al-Tahreem 66:6).

Ibn al-Qayyim (may Allaah have mercy on him) said: "How many people have caused misery to their own children, the apples of their eyes, in this world and in the Hereafter, by neglecting them, not disciplining them, encouraging them to follow their whims and desires, thinking that they were honouring them when they were in fact humiliating them, that they were being merciful to them when in fact they were wronging them. They have not benefited from having a child, and they have made the child lose his share in this world and in the Hereafter. If you think about the corruption of children you will see that in most cases it is because of the parents."

(Tuhfat al-Mawlood, p. 146)

5 _ Cheating in exams

How many ways and means of cheating there are among the students! The reason for that is the lack of any religious deterrent, weakness of faith, and the lack of any sense that Allaah is always watching.

Our Shaykh `Abd al-`Azeez ibn Baaz (may Allaah have mercy on him) said: "It was narrated that the Messenger of Allaah SAWS (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: `Whoever cheats us is not one of us.' This includes cheating in dealing with others and cheating in exams, including English-language exams. It is not permissible for students to cheat in exams in any subject, because of the general meaning of this hadeeth and other similar reports. And Allaah is the Source of strength."

These are some of the ways in which cheating is manifested, and there are others, for this is just a drop in the ocean,

"so that those who were to be destroyed (for their rejecting the Faith) might be destroyed after a clear evidence, and those who were to live (i.e. believers) might live after a clear evidence"

[al-An'aam 8:42 _ interpretation of the meaning]

To everyone who has committed some form of cheating, whether it is mentioned here or not, we say: fear Allaah and remember that the Knower of the Unseen is always watching you. Remember His punishment and torment:

"Verily, your Lord is Ever Watchful (over them)"

[al-Fajr 89:14]

Realize that this world is transient and that the Reckoning will examine the smallest details; righteous deeds benefit one's children while bad deeds adversely affect them. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

"And let those (executors and guardians) have the same fear in their minds as they would have for their own, if they had left weak offspring behind. So let them fear Allaah and speak right words"

[al-Nisa' 4:9]

Whoever ponders the meaning of this aayah will fear the bad effects that evil deeds may have on his children and will refrain from them lest something like this happen to them.

And it should be noted that cheating is very harmful, which may be explained as follows:

The harmful effects of cheating include:

1- Cheating is a way that leads to Hell.

2- It is indicative of the mean and evil nature of a person. No one does this except one who is ignoble and does not care about his soul, so he causes it to indulge in that which will cause its doom and destruction.

3- It alienates one from Allaah and from other people.

4- It causes one's du'aa's not to be accepted.

5- It causes one to be deprived of barakah (blessing) in one's wealth and one's life.

6- It is indicative of a lack of faith.

7- It is the reason that leads to being overpowered by the oppressors and kaafirs. Ibn Hajar al-Haythami said: "Because of these evil actions _ i.e., cheating _ that are committed by traders, workers and craftsmen, Allaah caused the oppressors to gain power over them and take their wealth and violate the sanctity of their women. Indeed, He enabled the kuffaar to gain power over them, so they took them prisoner and enslaved them, and made them taste all kinds of torment and humiliation.

Cases where the kuffaar gained power over the Muslims, taking them prisoner and confiscating their property, taking their wealth and women, have happened a great deal in recent times, because of evil deeds that traders and others have committed, cheating in many different ways, because of the enormity of these crimes, deceit and trickery by means of which they took the wealth of the Muslims in any way they could, and did not feel that Allaah is always watching them.

From al-Ghish by Zaahir al-Shahri (www.islam-qa.com)

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14587: Masturbating without using the hands

Question:

I receive questions from different people and I didn't know how to answer this one:

One young adult asked if masturbation was permissable. Not by doing it with hand but by stimulating oneself in different ways. Sheikh it is very embarrassing for me to ask you, i still can't figure out how that young man did? So stimulating oneself without touching the private part itself. I don't know how to answer this.


Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

Masturbation is haraam, as is indicated by the Qur'aan and Sunnah. See question no. 329.

Masturbation does not necessarily mean using the hands. Whether it is done using the hand or not, or by touching the private part or not, it is still haraam. The scholars have stated this clearly, including Ibn `Aabideen in his commentary on al-Durr al-Mukhtaar. Some people may do that using a machine or dummy etc, which are known as "sex toys". This is also not permitted. Shaykh Ibn `Uthaymeen (may Allaah have mercy on him) said that masturbation using the hands or otherwise is haraam according to the evidence of the Qur'aan and Sunnah, and sound opinion, etc. Fataawa al-Shaykh Ibn `Uthaymeen, ed. By Ashraf `Abd al-Maqsood, 2/931-932.

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Sheikh Muhammed Salih Al-Munajjid

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20012: Cheating in school work

Question:

since i goto a public school , and what they teach is mostly lies and other stuff, is it permisible for me to copy the work from a friend ..

i dont want to goto a public school because of the harram eviroment, but my parents want me to go, so i obey them.


Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

It is not permissible for you to copy school work from your classmates, because that is a form of cheating and we are forbidden to cheat. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "Whoever deceives us is not one of us." And that may also result in a great deal of harm in this world and in the Hereafter. So you must beware of that and advise others to avoid it.

But if you see the way someone else does the homework and you understand it, then you close his book and write your own answers, there is nothing wrong with that. And Allaah knows best.

Islam Q&A Sheikh Muhammed Salih Al-Munajjid (www.islam-qa.com)

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22340: Offensive and impermissible jokes

Question:

There is a group of young men who went on a trip to one city. One of them was in charge of booking tickets for the whole group of 19 people, and three of them agreed to set him up without the others knowing anything about it. Their plan was that one of the three would accuse the leader and his assistant of not booking a ticket for him despite the fact that he was with them in the airport. The argument between them became very heated and made the others worry that there would be a fight before they traveled. After five minutes the three youths put matters straight and told them all that what they had done was just a joke. Our question is: is the trick that they played and which could have led to the group not trusting the leader and his deputy permissible?


Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

This joke is too much, and it is not permissible. It involves accusing an innocent Muslim, and wrongly accusing a Muslim is haraam. It also involves stirring up hatred and resentment, and making people think badly of the supervisor. Generally speaking, the harmful effects are obvious and all of that is not permissible.

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20047: Ruling on clapping

Question:

I have come heard many views that clapping is not permissible in Islaam. For example, an applause when children are performing something or any other halaal performance. Could you state whether this is true and which hadith relates to this.


Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

Clapping during parties is one of the actions of jaahiliyyah. The least that can be said about it is that it is makrooh (disliked), but the evidence suggests rather that it is haraam, because the Muslims are not allowed to resemble the kuffaar. Allah says describing the kuffaar of Makkah (interpretation of the meaning):

"Their Salaah (prayer) at the House (of Allaah, i.e. the Ka`bah at Makkah) was nothing but whistling and clapping of hands"

[al-Anfaal 8:35]

The Sunnah is, when the believer sees something that he likes or dislikes, to say `Subhaan Allaah (Glory be to Allaah)' or `Allaahu akbar (Allaah is Most Great),' as was narrated from the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) in many ahaadeeth.

Clapping is prescribed specifically for women if something alarms them during the prayer, or they are praying with the men and the imaam makes a mistake in the prayer. In that case they should draw his attention to that by clapping, whereas men should do so by saying `Subhaan Allaah', as was narrated in the saheeh Sunnah from the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him). From this it may be known that clapping on the part of men implies imitation of kaafirs and women, and all of that is forbidden. And Allaah is the source of strength.

Shaykh Ibn Baaz.

The Standing Committee was asked about men clapping when they play with children, or children clapping to encourage their classmates. They replied:

This clapping is not appropriate, and at the very least it is intensely makrooh because this is one of the characteristics of the jaahiliyyah, and because it is something that is done only by women, to draw attention to a mistake in the prayer. And Allaah is the Source of strength.

From Fataawa Islamiyyah, vol. 4, p. 332-333

Children can be encouraged by saying `Allaahu akbar' if they do something that the watcher or listener likes, or one may use other suitable phrases, or raise one's hands, or raise one's voice in words of praise such as "Well done!" or "Excellent!" and so on. And Allaah is the Source of strength.

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22307: He pretends to be a girl so that he can get the names of bad websites and get them closed down

Question:

I have "MSN Messenger" and I get to know people through chat rooms and MSN Messenger. I claim to be a girl and I talk to them about sex so that I can get the names of websites from them, but my aim is to get the names of these sites so that I send word to the people who are responsible to close them down. Please note that I used to look at these sites too, before Allaah guided me.


Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

Our advice to you is not to do this thing, because by doing it you are exposing yourself to danger. Even though you have repented, and we praise Allaah for this blessing, the Shaytaan still flows through the son of Adam like his blood. No one should expose himself to temptation. We advise you to make use of your time in doing good things that are of great benefit, such as reading and memorizing Qur'aan, keeping company with righteous people, and seeking knowledge of sharee'ah and the Qur'aan and Sunnah from scholars who practise what they preach. It is good to visit beneficial Islamic sites on the web that spread good according to the way of Ahl al-Sunnah wa'l-Jamaa'ah, following the righteous salaf, may Allaah have mercy on them.

We ask Allaah to reward you with good for your zeal, and to make us and you steadfast in adhering to the truth until we meet Him… Aameen.

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13809: A man jokes with his mahrams in an obscene fashion

Question:

A man has nieces (his brother's daughters) and he jokes with them in an obscene manner. Is it permissible for them to avoid meeting him because of his obscene jokes?


Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

With regard to this man who has nieces _ i.e., he is their paternal uncle _ and the woman and the questioner say that he jokes with them in an obscene manner, it is not permissible for the nieces of such an uncle to come to him or to uncover their faces in front of him, because the scholars who say that it is permissible for a woman to uncover her face in front of a mahram allowed that on the condition that there be no fitnah. The fact that this man jokes with his brother's daughters in an obscene manner means that there is the fear of fitnah from him. So they have to keep away from the causes of fitnah. It is not surprising that someone could feel desire for his mahrams, for we have heard of someone who committed zina with his sister through his father (i.e., his half-sister) because she was not his full sister _ we seek refuge with Allaah. And we have heard worse than that, that there is someone who committed zina with his mother _ we seek refuge with Allaah. Look at what the Qur'aan says, where Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

"And marry not women whom your fathers married, except what has already passed; indeed it was shameful and most hateful, and an evil way"[al-Nisa' 4:22]

And Allaah says concerning zina (interpretation of the meaning):

"And come not near to unlawful sex [zina]. Verily, it is a Faahishah (i.e. anything that transgresses its limits: a great sin), and an evil way (that leads one to hell unless Allaah forgives him)."[al-Israa' 17:32]

He does not only say faahishah (shameful, a great sin), He also says, maqt (most hateful). This indicates that having intercourse with a mahram relative or one's father's wife who is also a mahram are crimes which are worse than zina.

So to sum up the Answer:

They must keep away from this uncle and not uncover their faces in front of him so long as they see that he is joking in this manner which makes them have doubts about him.

Shaykh Muhammad ibn Saalih al-`Uthaymeen, from Fataawa al-Jaami'ah li'l-Mar'ah al-Muslimah, p. 1006. (www.islam-qa.com)

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13993: Do colour and beauty carry any weight as a measure of virtue in Islam?

Question:

I would like to ask a question that is a common problem among many of us. How does Allah look at physical beauty? How is it discussed in Hadith and Quran? Many people favor some of their children over others just because of light skin color or eye color. How does the Quran view this?


Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

Physical beauty is not considered to be a measure of virtue among people in Islam; rather the standard on which distinctions are made is taqwa (piety, fear of Allaah). Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

"O mankind! We have created you from a male and a female, and made you into nations and tribes, that you may know one another. Verily, the most honourable of you with Allaah is that (believer) who has AtTaqwa [i.e. he is one of the Muttaqoon (the pious)]. Verily, Allaah is AllKnowing, AllAware"

[al-Hujuraat 49:13]

Hence sharee'ah came to correct our outlook which is usually based on outward appearances. There are many ahaadeeth on this topic, including the following:

It was narrated in al-Saheeh that Abu Hurayrah said: "The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: `Allaah does not look at your appearance or your wealth, but He looks at your hearts and your deeds.'" (Narrated by Muslim, al-Birr wa'l-Silah, 4651).

It was narrated that Abu Dharr said: "I exchanged words with another man, whose mother was a non-Arab. I insulted his mother, and he mentioned that to the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him). He said to me, `Did you trade insults with So and so?' I said, `Yes.' He said, `Did you insult his mother?' I said, `Yes.' He said, `You are a man in whom is jaahiliyyah (ignorance)…'" (Narrated by al-Bukhaari, al-Adab, 5590; Muslim, al-Eemaan, 3140). According to another report: "…I said to him, `O son of a black woman'," and the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said, "In you there is jaahiliyyah" _ i.e., one of the characteristics of jaahiliyyah.

It was narrated that Sahl ibn Sa'd al-Saa'idi said: "A man passed by the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) and he asked a man who was sitting with him, `What do you think of this man?' He said, `He is one of the nobility. By Allaah, if he proposes marriage he deserves to get married and if he intercedes, his intercession deserves to be accepted.' The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said nothing. Then another man passed by, and the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) asked, `What do you think of this man?' He said, `O Messenger of Allaah, he is one of the poor Muslims. If he proposes marriage he does not deserve to get married, if he intercedes his intercession does not deserve to be accepted and if he speaks he does not deserve to be heard.' The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: `This one (the second man) is better than an earthful of (men like) that one (the first man).'" (Narrated by al-Bukhaari, al-Riqaaq, 5966).

It was narrated from Abu Hurayrah that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "People should stop boasting about their forefathers who have died, for they are no more than the fuel of Hell, or they will be more insignificant before Allaah than the dung beetle which rolls up dung with its nose. Allaah has taken away your jaahili arrogance and pride in your ancestors; rather man is either a believer who fears Allaah or an immoral person who is doomed. All of them are the sons of Adam and Adam was created from dust." (Narrated by al-Tirmidhi, al-Manaaqib, 3890; classed as hasan by al-Albaani in Saheeh Sunan al-Tirmidhi, no. 3100).

All these ahaadeeth indicate that which we have mentioned above, which is that one's appearance and colour should not be the basis of one's feeling proud, distinguished, superior or of high status, and that the Muslim should get close to those who are pious and righteous.

It was narrated that `Amr ibn al-`Aas said: "I heard the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) saying out loud, not quietly: `…Rather my friends are Allaah and the righteous believers…'" (Narrated by al-Bukhaari, al-Adab, 5531; Muslim, al-Eemaan, 316).

With regard to dealing with one's children, it is obligatory to treat them fairly and not to prefer some of them over others, even if one of them honours his father more than another. So how about if the distinction is based on the colour of the child's skin or the colour of his eyes? This is a serious matter and it is a grave wrongdoing. Parents have to fear Allaah when dealing with their children and treat them fairly. It says in the hadeeth whose authenticity is agreed upon, which was narrated from al-Nu'maan ibn Basheer that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "Fear Allaah and treat your children fairly." (Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 2398; Muslim, 3055). This kind of favouritism generates envy and hatred between the children. We ask Allaah to keep us safe and sound. And Allaah knows best. May Allaah bless our Prophet Muhammad.

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13811: What the teacher did is haraam

Question:

One of the students is very fond of a teacher, and the teacher shares this feeling. The teacher was reading the students' answers to a test, then she dictated the answers to this girl so that she could get a higher grade, i.e., it was an act of blatant cheating. What is the ruling on this? Also, does the crowing of a roosetr mean that it has seen the angels?


Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

This cheating on the part of the teacher is haraam, and it is also haraam for her to single out and favour one student. If she likes her because she is taken with her prettiness, beauty, energy, knowledge, intelligence or character, then she may praise her for that, but helping her to cheat is haraam. With regard to the second part of the question, yes, this is correct. The hadeeth says: "If you hear the voice of the rooster, then ask Allaah of His bounty, for it has seen an angel. But if you hear the braying a donkey then seek refuge with Allaah from the Shaytaan, for it has seen a devil."

Shaykh `Abd-Allaah ibn `Abd al-Rahmaan al-Jibreen from Al-Daw'ah magazine, no. 1795, p. 45 (www.islam-qa.com)

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13493: It is essential to punish cell phone owners who send dirty messages

Question:

There is a serious phenomenon which has become widespread. This is the exchange of messages (inappropriate messages) between boys and girls via cell phones. Could you comment on this?.


Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

In fact I liken the messages which are sent via cell phones to the graffiti on bathroom walls. This is a filthy action done by those who have no understanding. What is astounding is that their numbers appear with their messages, and there are sometimes message in which there appears a kind of shirk or association of others with Allaah.

Shaykh Ibraaheem al-Khudayri.

It is essential to advise those who send these messages via cell phone and to remind them of Allaah and of the ruling on their actions, and to tell them that they may be included among those who spread immorality among the believers. And Allaah is the One Whose help we seek.

Al-Daw'ah Magazine, issue no. 1795, p. 47 (www.islam-qa.com)

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22050: Looking at pictures of women led him to commit the "secret vice"

Question:

What is the ruling on looking at pictures of promiscuous women and then doing the "secret vice" (masturbation) for fear of falling into zina (fornication) or homosexuality? May Allaah reward you with good.


Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

With regard to the ruling on looking at naked pictures, please see question # 8861.

With regard to your committing the "secret vice", your looking at something haraam led you to commit another haraam action. Perhaps it may lead you in the future to commit one of the major sins _ Allaah forbid _ such as fornication or homosexuality.

Doing the "secret vice" is haraam. It is important that you see question no. 329.

What you have to do is to repent to Allaah from the sins that you have committed, and keep away from every haraam thing that may provoke desire. You will not find any better means than fearing Allaah, then protecting yourself by means of marriage. If you cannot get married, then you have to fast, for it will be a shield for you. This is the advice of the Prophet SAWS (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) to young men. Try not to be unoccupied as far as you can, and seek the help of Allaah. And Allaah knows best. May Allaah bless our Prophet Muhammad.

Al-Akhlaaq (characteristics) _ al-Akhlaaq al-Madhmoomah (Blameworthy characteristics) .

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13611: Ruling on backbiting about non-Muslims

Question:

Please inform us if the gheebah (backbiting) is the same for non-believers as it is for Muslims.


Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

Firstly, it is not a Muslim characteristic to speak rudely. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "The Muslim does not slander, curse, speak obscenely or speak rudely." (Narrated by al-Tirmidhi, who said, this is a ghareeb hasan hadeeth; it was classed as saheeh by al-Albaani). Whoever does a thing a lot, it will become his habit, so the Muslim should keep away from all the ways that lead to evil, whether minor or major. Whoever drives his sheep near the enclosure of the king is bound to cross the line.

Secondly, if your question is referring to backbiting about a kaafir by mentioning his physical defects, such as his having a long nose or a big mouth, etc., then do not do this, because this is making fun of the creation of Allaah. If it means talking about his bad characteristics which he flaunts openly, such as zina and immorality, or drinking alcohol, and warning against him, there is nothing wrong with that. There follow some of the comments of the scholars on this topic:

Zakariya al-Ansaari said: "Backbiting about a kaafir is haraam if he is a dhimmi [a non-Muslim living under Islamic rule], because that puts them off from accepting the jizyah and it is going against the treaty of dhimmah (agreement between non-Muslim subjects and the Islamic state) and the words of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him). `Whoever makes a snide comment to a dhimmi has earned Hell.' (Narrated by Ibn Hibbaan in his Saheeh). It is permissible (to backbite about a kaafir) if he is a harbi (one who is at war with the Muslims), because the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) used to command Hassaan to lampoon the mushrikeen." (Asna al-Mutaalib ma'a Haashiyatihi, vol. 3, p. 116)

Ahmad ibn Hajar al-Haythami said in al-Zawaajir `an Iqtiraaf al-Kabaa'ir (vol. 2, p. 27): "Al-Ghazaali was asked about backbiting about a kaafir. He said: with regard to a Muslim, it is forbidden for three reasons: causing offence; criticizing the creation of Allaah, for Allaah is the Creator of the deeds of His slaves; and wasting time in something that is of no benefit. The first is haraam, the second is makrooh, and the third is not the best thing that one can do. With regard to the dhimmi, he is like the Muslim as far as not harming him is concerned, because the Lawgiver protects his honour, blood and property. It was said in al-Khaadim, the first view is correct. Ibn Hibbaan narrated in his Saheeh that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said, `Whoever makes a snide comment to a Jew or a Christian deserves Hell.' The meaning of making a snide comment is to make someone hear something that will cause offence to him. There is no stronger evidence than this, i.e., it is haraam. Al-Ghazaali said: with regard to the harbi, the former is not haraam, and the second and third are makrooh. With regard to one who commits bid'ah (innovation), if he is becomes a kaafir thereby, then he is like a harbi, otherwise he is like a Muslim, but speaking of him with regard to his bid'ah is not makrooh. Ibn al-Mundhir said, concerning the words of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him), "It is your mentioning about your brother that which he dislikes," _ this indicates that in the case of one who is not your brother, such as a Jew or a Christian or a follower of any other religion, or one whose bid'ah has put him beyond the pale of Islam, there is no backbiting in his case."

12205: How can he rid himself of jealousy towards his brothers?

Question:

to be a true beliver 1 quility is to love for your brother what u love for yourself. Al humdurilla this is easy to do with my blood brother, but very difficult to do this for any of my muslim brothers except a few , the reason being is that when i see my muslim brother better then me in anything i feel jealous, i thing it's pride(brother i make duaa to allah to forgive me for felling like this but when i see my muslim brother again,this feeling comes back again)

I want to fell happy seeing my muslim brother prosper and i want to fell sad when he's sad.but whenever i see people praising my muslim brother i fell jealous.
i also fell like wanting for my muslim brother janatul ferdose but whenever my muslim brother tells me something which will benefit me for deen, i want to practice it but saythan comes and tell me that if i practice it then my muslim brother would get the same rewards as i would and so his stage will be higher then minein jannah, my nafs sometimes fall for this trap.

i would like to know how i can get total cure from this problem.


Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

What every Muslim is obliged to do, as you mentioned, is to love for his brother what he loves for himself of good things, and to hate for his brother what he hates for himself of bad things. This does not mean that he cannot like for himself what he likes for others. If he sees that his brother has something that he does not, and he wishes that he had it too, this is ghibtah (envy that is free from malice); if he wishes that the blessing would be taken away from them, this is called hasad (destructive jealousy).

The Muslim needs to strive against his own self (jihaad al-nafs) so that his heart will be free of jealousy towards his Muslim brothers. If he sincerely loves his brothers, most of these problems from which he is suffering will disappear. When the Muslim realizes how great his virtue and status will be when he loves his brothers and loves good things for them, and when he knows how great his reward will be if he treats them well, this will motivate him to treat them well in all ways, and to strive to benefit his brothers instead of being preoccupied with jealous thoughts of what they have and he doesn't.

Shaykh Muhammad al-Duwaysh.

You have to think long and hard about the words of Allaah (interpretation of the meaning):

"That is the Grace of Allaah which He bestows on whom He wills

[al-Maa'idah 5:54]

"It is We Who portion out between them their livelihood in this world, and We raised some of them above others in ranks, so that some may employ others in their work

[al-Zukhruf 43:32]

Hasad (destructive jealousy) causes a great deal of harm in this world and in the Hereafter. Al-Tirmidhi narrated from al-Zubayr ibn al-`Awaam that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said:

"There has come to you the disease of the nations before you, jealousy and hatred. This is the `shaver' (destroyer); I do not say that it shaves hair, but that it shaves (destroys) faith. By the One in Whose Hand is my soul, you will not enter Paradise until you believe, and you will not believe until you love one another. Shall I not tell you of that which will strengthen love between you? Spread (the greeting of) salaam amongst yourselves." (A hasan hadeeth. Jaami' al-Tirmidhi, 2434).

Concerning the meaning of the phrase "it shaves (destroys) faith", al-Tayyibi said: "i.e., hatred takes away faith like a razor takes away hair." (Tuhfat al-Ahwadhi bi Sharh Jaami' al-Tirmidhi).

It seems, my brother, that you know the ruling and are aware of the consequences, and that you want to rid yourself of this blameworthy characteristic. Here are some solutions for you.

1- Make du'aa' (supplication) to Allaah and ask Him to rid you of this problem. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) used to say in his du'aa', "Wa'hdi qalbi wa'slul sakheemata sadri (guide my heart and remove ill will from my breast)." The phrase "guide my heart" means to the straight path, and "remove ill will from my breast" means take away all insincerity, rancour and hatred.

2- Pondering the meanings of the Qur'aan and reading it frequently, especially the verses which speak of hasad (destructive jealousy), because reading the Qur'aan brings one a great deal of hasanaat (reward for good deeds). Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

"Verily, the good deeds remove the evil deeds

[Hood 11:114]

3- Reading the seerah (biography) of the Messenger (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him), seeing how he kept away from hasad and how he loved good for others, even for his enemies. Among the useful books on seerah is Noor al-Yaqeen fi Seerat Sayyid al-Mursaleen.

[Translator's note: a well-known book of seerah which is available in English is "Al-Raheeq al-Makhtoom (the Sealed Nectar) _ Biography of the Noble Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him), by Safi-ur-Rahmaan al-Mubarakpuri]

4- Reading the biographies and stories of the Sahaabah in books such as Suwar min Hayaat al-Sahaabah by `Abd al-Rahmaan Ra'fat al-Basha)

5- If any such thoughts (of hasad, etc.) cross your mind, then seek refuge with Allaah from the accursed Shaytaan, and keep yourself busy with something that will make you forget these insinuating whispers and thoughts.

6- If the Shaytaan manages to instil hasad in your heart, then beware lest you say or do anything which will show that hasad. Every person has his or her share of hasad. Shaykh al-Islam Ibn Taymiyah said: "Nobody is free from hasad, but the noble person hides it whilst the base person shows it." (Amraad al-Quloob). A person will not be brought to account for whatever crosses his mind, but he will be brought to account for what he says and does. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "Allaah will forgive my ummah for their mistakes, what they forget and what they are forced to do." (Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 2033).

7- If you feel that you are jealous of a specific person, then buy him a gift and shake hands with him. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "Shake hands, for this will dispel rancour, and exchange gifts and love one another, for this will dispel hatred." (Narrated by Maalik in al-Muwatta', 1413). Hasad is the result of hatred, whose opposite is love, the way of which is giving gifts and spreading (the greeting of) salaam, because the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "You will not enter Paradise until you believe, and you will not believe until you love one another. Shall I not tell you of that which will strengthen love between you? Spread (the greeting of) salaam amongst yourselves." (Narrated by Muslim, 81).

Shaykh al-Islam Ibn Taymiyah said in his book Amraad al-Quloob (diseases of the heart):

"Whoever find in himself any hasad towards another has to try to neutralize it by means of taqwa (piety, consciousness of Allaah) and sabr (patience). So he should hate that (the feeling of hasad) in himself… But the one who does wrong to his brother by word or deed will be punished for that. The one who fears Allaah and is patient, however, is not included among the wrongdoers, and Allaah will benefit him by his taqwa."

And Allaah knows best.

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12277: Is masturbation permissible if a person knows that he would not be able to give a wife her rights?

Question:

According to Islam a person must get married as soon as possible so as to prevent him from commiting illegal sexual acts, including masturbation.But if the person is sure that he will not be able to respect the haququl Ibad of his wife then what is to be done?Should he still go ahead and get married or is it permissible for him to masturbate?

Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

The Prophet SAWS (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "O young men, whoever among you can afford to marry, let him get married, and whoever cannot do that, then he should fast, for it will be a protection for him." (Narrated by al-Bukhaari, al-Nikaah, 4677)

Ibn Hajar said in Fath al-Baari: With respect to marriage, the scholars have divided men into several Islam & Muslims.

The first is those who have the desire to get married and who have the financial means to do so and who fear for themselves. It is recommended for such a person to get married according to all the scholars; according to one report the Hanbalis said that it is obligatory. The well-known view of Ahmad is that it is not obligatory for the one who is able and has the desire, unless he fears hardship.

Ibn Daqeeq al-`Eid said: Some of the fuqaha' divided marriage into five rulings. They said that it is obligatory in cases where there is the fear of hardship, where a man is able for marriage and it is difficult to find a concubine. This was narrated by al-Qurtubi from one of their scholars, namely al-Maaziri, who said: it is obligatory in the case of one who cannot keep away from zinaa otherwise, as stated above.

He said: it is forbidden in the case of one who will not take care of his wife with regard to intercourse and spending on her, who is not able for marriage and has no desire for it. Al-Safaareeni said: the poor man who cannot spend on a wife and has no income, and has no desire _ in this case it is said that marriage is makrooh for him, because he is cannot afford it and he cannot provide his wife with enjoyment to protect her, and he has no need for it.

See Ghidhaa' al-Albaab, vol. 2, p. 434

`Iyaad said: it is recommended in the case of everyone who hopes for offspring even if he has no desire for intercourse, because the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "I will be proud of your great numbers." And because of the encouragement for marriage and the commands to marry. The same applies to the one who has any desire for other kinds of enjoyment of women besides intercourse. But in the case of one who is sterile or has no desire for women or for physical pleasure, marriage is permissible for him if the woman knows and accepts that.

The hadeeth indicates that masturbation is haraam, because if it were prescribed the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) would have indicated that. See also Question no. 329

If a person is patient in abstaining from that which Allaah has forbidden and gives it up because he is seeking the pleasure of Allaah, then Allaah will reward him abundantly on the Day of Resurrection, because whoever gives up something for the sake of Allaah, Allaah will compensate him with something better.

And Allaah says, describing the believers (interpretation of the meaning):

"And those who guard their chastity (i.e. private parts, from illegal sexual acts)" [al-Mu'minoon 23:5]

The Muslim has to follow the path prescribed by Islam, as taught by the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him), which is fasting. May Allaah protect you and us from falling into haraam. And Allaah knows best.

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10445: Using a machine that leads to orgasm

Question:

I have an embarrassing question, but need to know. If a woman uses a massager on her vagina, is this considered masturbation. What is the ruling concerning using this if the woman is under alot of stress and sees good-looking men at work but her husband is living in another country?


Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

You have to keep away from everything that leads to a provocation of desire, for these means will no doubt ultimately lead you to fall into doing the "secret habit", which is haraam. See Question # 329. What counts is doing that which leads to a climax, whether that is done directly by the hand or by using a machine whose vibrations lead to a climax. So strive against yourself (jihaad al-nafs) and do not do that. You must keep away from and avoid places where you may mix with men, because that is haraam according to sharee'ah, because the Shaytaan will make you commit evil actions so long as you meet with them every day, especially since your husband is absent. See Question # 1200. You have to get in touch with your husband and tell him that he has to be there so that you will not end up doing something haraam. See Question # 6713. And Allaah knows best.

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12387: The danger of hypocrisy

Question:

What is hypocrisy and how dangerous is it for the Muslims?

Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

Hypocrisy is a serious sickness and a great crime. It means making an outward display of Islam whilst inwardly concealing kufr. Hypocrisy is more dangerous than kufr (disbelief) and the punishment for it is more severe, because it is kufr mixed with Islam and its harmful effects are greater. Hence Allaah will put the hypocrites in the lowest level of Hell, as He says (interpretation of the meaning):

"Verily, the hypocrites will be in the lowest depth (grade) of the Fire; no helper will you find for them[al-Nisaa' 4:145]

The hypocrites are always confused, always planning deceit and plots. Although outwardly they appear to be with the believers, inwardly they are with the kaafireen. So sometimes they are inclined towards the believers and sometimes they are inclined towards the kaafireen.

"(They are) swaying between this and that, belonging neither to these nor to those; and he whom Allaah sends astray, you will not find for him a way (to the truth — Islam)"[al-Nisaa' 4:143 _ interpretation of the meaning]

Because of the corruption of their hearts, the hypocrites are the most averse of mankind to the religion of Allaah, as Allaah tells us about them (interpretation of the meaning):

"And when it is said to them: `Come to what Allaah has sent down and to the Messenger (Muhammad),' you (Muhammad) see the hypocrites turn away from you (Muhammad) with aversion"

[al-Nisaa' 4:61]

The dealings of the hypocrites revolve around their own interests. When they meet the believers, they make a show of belief and loyalty, in order to deceive the believers and as an action of dissimulation, hoping for whatever good and war-booty they have. But when they meet their masters and chiefs, they say, we are with you in your shirk and kufr. Allaah says concerning them (interpretation of the meaning):

"And when they meet those who believe, they say: "We believe," but when they are alone with their Shayaateen (devils — polytheists, hypocrites), they say: "Truly, we are with you; verily, we were but mocking

Allaah mocks at them and gives them increase in their wrong-doing to wander blindly"[al-Baqarah 2:14-15]

The hypocrites have many characteristics, the worst and most serious of which is disbelief in Allaah. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

"And when it is said to them (hypocrites): `Believe as the people (followers of Muhammad, Al-Ansaar and Al-Muhaajiroon) have believed,' they say: `Shall we believe as the fools have believed?' Verily, they are the fools, but they know not"[al-Baqarah 2:13]

Among their characteristics are enmity and envy (hasad) towards the believers, as Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

"If good befalls you (O Muhammad), it grieves them, but if a calamity overtakes you, they say: `We took our precaution beforehand' and they turn away rejoicing"[al-Tawbah 9:50]

Among their characteristics is mockery of Allaah, His Messenger and His religion. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

"If you ask them (about this), they declare: `We were only talking idly and joking.' Say: `Was it at Allaah, and His Ayaat (proofs, evidences, verses, lessons, signs, revelations, etc.) and His Messenger that you were mocking?'

Make no excuse; you disbelieved after you had believed"

[al-Tawbah 9:65-66]

Among their characteristics is that they spread corruption on earth, with disbelief, hypocrisy and sins. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

"And when it is said to them: `Make not mischief on the earth,' they say: `We are only peacemakers.'

Verily, they are the ones who make mischief, but they perceive not"

[al-Baqarah 2:11-12]

Among their characteristics are slander and lies. Allaah tells us about them (interpretation of the meaning):

"They swear by Allaah that they are truly, of you while they are not of you, but they are a people (hypocrites) who are afraid (that you may kill them)"

[al-Tawbah 9:56]

Among their characteristics is that they enjoin what is evil and forbid what is good, and they are stingy with their wealth. Allaah says concerning them (interpretation of the meaning):

"The hypocrites, men and women, are one from another; they enjoin (on the people) AlMunkar (i.e. disbelief and polytheism of all kinds and all that Islam has forbidden), and forbid (people) from Al Ma`roof (i.e. Islamic Monotheism and all that Islam orders one to do), and they close their hands [from giving (spending in Allaah's Cause) alms]. They have forgotten Allaah, so He has forgotten them. Verily, the hypocrites are the Faasiqoon (rebellious, disobedient to Allaah)"[al-Tawbah 9:74]

Among their characteristics are greed and avarice:

"And of them are some who accuse you (O Muhammad) in the matter of (the distribution of) the alms. If they are given part thereof, they are pleased, but if they are not given thereof, behold! They are enraged![al-Tawbah 9: 58 _ interpretation of the meaning]

Among their characteristics are those which were described by the Messenger (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him):

"There are four (characteristics), whoever has all of them is a complete hypocrite, and whoever has some of them has some element of hypocrisy, unless he gives it up: when he speaks, he lies; when he makes a treaty, he betrays it; when he makes a promise, he breaks it; when he quarrels, he resorts to insults."(Narrated by Muslim, 53)

Among their characteristics is a concern with appearances and fancy speech whilst they are inwardly corrupt. Allaah says concerning them (interpretation of the meaning):

"And when you look at them, their bodies please you; and when they speak, you listen to their words. They are as blocks of wood propped up. They think that every cry is against them. They are the enemies, so beware of them. May Allaah curse them! How are they denying (or deviating from) the Right Path?"[al-Munaafiqoon 63:4]

If the kuffaar are obvious enemies from without, then the hypocrites are hidden enemies from within. They are more harmful and more dangerous to the Muslims, because they mix with them and know their situation. Allaah has decreed that the ultimate destiny of the kuffaar and hypocrites will be in Hell:

"Surely, Allaah will collect the hypocrites and disbelievers all together in Hell"[al-Nisaa' 4:140 _ interpretation of the meaning]

But because of the seriousness of the harm they cause, the hypocrites will be in the lowest level of Hell, as Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

"Verily, the hypocrites will be in the lowest depth (grade) of the Fire"[al-Nisaa' 4:145]

Because the danger posed to the Muslim ummah by the kuffaar and hypocrites is so great, Allaah commanded His Messenger to strive against them:

"O Prophet (Muhammad)! Strive hard against the disbelievers and the hypocrites, and be severe against them; their abode will be Hell, and worst indeed is that destination" [al-Tahreem 66:9 _ interpretation of the meaning]

From Usool al-Deen al-Islami by Shaykh Muhammad ibn Ibraaheem al-Tuwayjri (www.islam-qa.com)

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11726: Is it counted as committing sin openly if a person commits sin in front of his children?

Question:

Is it counted as committing sin openly if a person commits sin in front of his children?

Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

We put this question to our shaykh, Muhammad ibn Saalih al-`Uthaymeen (may Allaah preserve him), who answered as follows:

I seek refuge with Allaah! This is worse than committing sin openly, because in addition to committing sin openly, it is giving a bad upbringing.

Question: If he does it inside his own house and not in front of people, will he still be counted as committing sin openly?

Answer: If he were to do it in his own room on his own, we would not say that this committing sin openly, but the fact that he is doing it in front of his children means that he is giving them a bad upbringing as well as committing sin openly. Hence smokers must not smoke in front of their children, because by doing so they are teaching them to smoke. And Allaah knows best.

shaykh, Muhammad ibn Saalih al-`Uthaymeen

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9562: Warning to the one who shows off and boasts about his sin

Question:

I boasted about my sins that I committed that Allah had hidden from people. I read such a person cannot be forgiven ? Is this true ? Is there any way out ?


Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

The Muslim should be far removed from obscenity and obscene actions. One of the most evil of things is that Muslims should openly manifest their immoral actions and their being far from Allaah. An example of this is when a Muslim commits a sin which angers Allaah, His Creator, Master and Lord, and Allaah, the Concealer, the Most Generous, the Forgiver, who could, if He willed, cause the earth to swallow him when he is committing that promiscuous act and neglecting the sacred limits set by Allaah, conceals his action. Even worse than that, he becomes proud of angering Allaah and spreads news of that among people, uncovering that which Allaah has concealed from the people. How could Allaah forgive something like this?

Hence Allaah may deprive a person like this of repentance.

It was narrated that Saalim ibn `Abd-Allaah said: I heard Abu Hurayrah say: I heard the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said:

"All of my ummah will be fine except for those who commit sin openly. Part of committing sin openly is when a man does something at night and Allaah conceals it, but in the morning he says, `O So-and-so, last night I did such and such.' His Lord had covered his sin all night, but in the morning he removed the cover of Allaah." (Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 5721; Muslim, 2990)

Al-Haafiz Ibn Hajar said:

Concerning the command to cover or conceal, a hadeeth was narrated which does not meet the conditions of al-Bukhaari. This is the hadeeth of Ibn `Umar which is attributed to the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him): "Avoid these obscenities which Allaah has forbidden. Whoever commits any of them, let him be concealed with the concealment of Allaah." The hadeeth was narrated by al-Haakim and is also included in al-Muwatta' as one of the mursal reports of Zayd ibn Aslam.

Ibn Battaal said: Openly flaunting one's sins implies disrespect towards Allaah and His Messenger, and the righteous believers, and is a type of stubborn provocation. Concealing sin protects one against being disrespectful in this manner, because sin brings humiliation upon the people who commit it, such as the hadd punishment if it is a sin that carries such a penalty, or the ta'zeer penalty if no hadd is enjoined. If it is something which violates the rights of Allaah, then He is the Most Generous and His Mercy precedes His Wrath. Hence if He conceals it in this world, He will not expose it in the Hereafter, but the one who flaunts it openly loses all of that.

The hadeeth clearly condemns those who openly flaunt their sin, which implies praise of those who conceal their sin. The fact that Allaah conceals it implies that the believer must also cover himself. Whoever deliberately flaunts his sin angers his Lord, Who will not then cover him. Whoever deliberately conceals his sin out of shame before his Lord and before people, Allaah will bless him by concealing it. (Fath al-Baari, 10/487-488)

al-Mannaawi said:

What is meant is those who talk openly to one another about their sins. Ibn Jamaa'ah included in this disclosure of what happens between husband and wife of permissible things. This is supported by the famous report which warns against that: "It is part of flaunting one's sins" _ i.e., speaking openly about them and broadcasting them _ "that a man should do an evil deed at night, then the following morning, when Allaah had covered him, he says, `Last night I did such and such' _ when all night his Lord had concealed his sin, but in the morning he uncovers what Allaah had concealed." _ by telling people about his sin. This is a betrayal on his part of the covering of Allaah which had been lowered upon him, and a provocation of the desire for evil in the people who hear him or see him. So these are two offences which are added to his original offence and make it worse. If in addition to that he encourages others to do likewise, this is a fourth offence that makes the matter even worse… The implication is that they have no sins unless they flaunt them, then he explained that the one who flaunts his sin is the one who does something at night and his Lord conceals it, then in the morning he says, `O So-and-so, last night I did such and such,' so he removes the covering of Allaah. He is to be condemned in this world by carrying out the hadd punishment, for it is among the attributes and blessings of Allaah that He brings forth what is beautiful and conceals what is ugly. So openly flaunting sin is a rejection of that blessing and disrespect towards the concealment of Allaah. Al-Nawawi said: It is makrooh for the person who is tested with sin to tell anyone else about it. Rather he should give it up, regret it and resolve not to do it again. If he tells his shaykh or a similar person who he hopes can teach him a way out from it or show him how to keep himself from falling into similar sins, or can tell him the reason why he fell into it, or make du'aa' for him, etc., this is fine. But is it makrooh (to tell someone else) if there is no benefit in doing so. Al-Ghazaali said: The kind of disclosure which is blameworthy is when it is in done by way of openly flaunting sin and mocking, not when it is done to ask questions and seek fatwas. The evidence for saying this is the report of the man who had intercourse with his wife in Ramadaan, and he came and told the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him), who did not rebuke him for telling him. (Fayd al-Qadeer, 5/11-12)

This has to do with open flaunting of sins. But what you have said about showing off and boasting is not simply the matter of not being forgiven for sin. There is the fear that it may imply riddah (apostasy) and going out of Islam, because showing off and boasting about sin may imply that one is permitting something that Allaah has forbidden.

Shaykh Ibn `Uthaymeen said:

There is a third kind of immoral, promiscuous evildoer, who speaks of zinaa in order to show off _ we seek refuge with Allaah _ and tells people that he went to such and such a country and committed immoral actions and zinaa with a number of women, and other things of which he boasts.

Such a person must be asked to repent; if he repents, all well and good, otherwise he should be executed, because if a person boasts of zinaa, this implies that he views it as permissible _ Allaah forbid _ and whoever regards zinaa as permissible is a kaafir.

There are some evil people who do this, because of whom and their deeds the Muslims are suffering calamities.

There are people who boast about such actions. They travel to countries which are well known for immorality and promiscuity, such as Bangkok and other places which are full of zinaa, homosexuality, alcohol, etc., then they come back to their friends and boast about what they have done.

Such a person must _ as I have said _be asked to repent. If he repents, all well and good, otherwise he should be executed, because whoever regards zinaa or other actions which by scholarly consensus are haraam, as being permissible, is a kaafir.

(Sharh Riyaadh al-Saaliheen, 1/116).

The way out from your situation, is sincere repentance to Allaah, and not going to extremes in committing sins. If you do happen to commit a sin, do not tear away the covering with which Allaah conceals your sin. And Allaah knows best.

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9345: Deceiving and lying are not permitted in dealings with others

Question:

We have a shop selling auto parts. When we want to write the bill for the customer, we deduct part of the amount, but he asks us to write the original price on the bill, and he does that because the product is not for him. What is the ruling on that?


Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

If this involves deceit and cheating, it is not permissible under any circumstances. It is haraam for you to give him a bill stating more than the amount which he paid in order to take money from the state or any other body for this bill. This is deceit and cheating, and is not allowed. And Allaah knows best.

From Fataawa Samaahat al-Shaykh `Abd-Allaah ibn Humayd, p. 189

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7491: Thinking about immoral actions

Question:

There is much talk of homosexuality, and how much it is forbidden. I find this topic "almost" totaly solved. You say it is haram to be a homosexual. The are two main factors which come to mind. My question is, is the act of having homosexual relations haram, or the though of being homosexual/having homosexual thoughts? Is there a way to repent for those unfortunate?


Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

There is no doubt that homosexuality and lesbianism are forbidden, as mentioned in the question, and doing these actions is a major sin which deserves the wrath of the Lord and His painful punishment. The Lawgiver is wise and does not forbid anything to people unless it is harmful and damaging to them in this world and in the Hereafter. As far as merely thinking about such sins is concerned, a person will not be punished for that, so long as he does not do it or talk about it, as the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "Allaah will forgive my Ummah for whatever crosses their minds, so long as they do not act upon it or speak about it.

But thinking a lot about something could lead to a person doing it; at the very least it distracts a person from thinking about something useful that he could do. The scholars of Islam used to call for reform of one's thinking and striving against bad thoughts, because they may gradually lead one to disastrous consequences. The "doctor of the hearts" Ibn al-Qayyim (may Allaah have mercy on him) said:

"Ward off passing thoughts, for if you do not, they will become ideas. Ward off ideas, for if you do not, they will become desires. Fight them, for if you do not, they will become resolve and determination, and if you do not ward them off, they will become actions. If you do not resist them with their opposite, they will become habits and it will be difficult for you to get rid of them." (Al-Fawaa'id by Ibn al-Qayyim, p. 33).

The way to repent is clear: give up the sin immediately; regret what has happened; resolve never to go back to it; do a lot of good deeds, for they wipe out bad deeds; keep away from the people with whom you used to commit this sin and shun them if they do not repent; keep away from bad company and everything that calls you to this sin. And Allaah will accept the repentance of those who repent to Him.

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11125: Telling lies in order to get a visa to enter the US

Question:

I will be taking a second wife ishaallah. I applied for a fiancee' visa so we could marry in the US. That was denied.as well as an immigrant visa. Is it haraam to use another person's id for her to enter the country?


Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

I think that it is not permissible to deceive or tell lies in such cases when the first request has been refused. Submit a second application and state your reasons. Using someone else's passport or ID, or someone else's visa _ we think that this involves some measure of lying or deception. So he should apply again until he gets what he has requested.

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3365: Ruling on the one who sins openly and tells his friends about it

Question:

I heard from our Friday khutbah that a person will not be forgiven if he has bragged and boasted to his friends about his sin while Allah had hidden it, and he quoted a hadeeth to support his claim. Is this true ? I thought Allah forgives all sins! I am really in despair now.


Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

With regard to the idea that Allaah forgives all sins: this is correct, because Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

"Say: "O `Ibaadi (My slaves) who have transgressed against themselves (by committing evil deeds and sins)! Despair not of the Mercy of Allaah, verily, Allaah forgives all sins. Truly, He is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful" [al-Zumar 39:53].

Minor sins (saghaa'ir) are expiated for by doing acts of worship and by avoiding major sins (kabaa'ir), because of the following evidence (daleel):

Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

"If you avoid the great sins which you are forbidden to do, We shall expiate from you your (small) sins, and admit you to a Noble Entrance (i.e. Paradise)" [al-Nisaa' 4:31]

It was reported from Ibn Mas'ood that a man kissed a woman, then he came to the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) and told him about it. Then Allaah revealed the words (interpretation of the meaning): "And perform As-Salaah (Iqaamat-as- Salaah), at the two ends of the day and in some hours of the night [i.e. the five compulsory Salaah (prayers)]. Verily, the good deeds remove the evil deeds (i.e. small sins)." [Hood 11:114]. The man said, O Messenger of Allaah, is this just for me? He said, "It is for all of my Ummah." (Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 503; Muslim, 2763)

It was reported from Abu Hurayrah that the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "The five prayers and Jumu'ah are an expiation from one week to the next, so long as you do not commit major sins." (Narrated by Muslim, 233).

There are many things that expiate for minor sins, such as fasting, qiyaam, wudoo', etc. But major sins require specific acts of expiation, such as sincere repentance, the carrying out of the Islamic punishment (hadd) on the one who committed them, etc., as can be seen in the following texts:

It was reported from `Ubaadah ibn al-Saamit (may Allaah be pleased with him) that the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said, when there was a group of his Sahaabah around him: "Give allegiance to me that you will not associate anything in worship with Allaah, not steal, not commit fornication, not kill your children… and not disobey me in what is right. Whoever among you fulfils this, his reward will be with Allaah. Whoever commits any of these sins will be punished in this world and that will be an expiation for him. Whoever commits any of these sins but Allaah conceals it, then it will be for Allaah to decide: if He wills, He will forgive him, and if He wills, He will punish him." So we gave allegiance to him on that basis.

The phrase "he will be punished in this world" means, the Islamically-prescribed punishment (hadd) will be carried out on him.

It was reported from Abu Sa'eed al-Khudri (may Allaah be pleasd with him) that the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "Among the Children of Israel there was a man who killed ninety-nine people. Then he went out and came to a monk and asked him, `Can I repent?' He said, `No,' so he killed him. Then he started asking, and a man said to him, `Go to such and such a town.' But death caught up with him, so he inclined his chest towards (that town, as he was dying). The angels of mercy and the angels of punishment disputed concerning him. Allaah inspired (the good town) to come closer to him, and (the evil town) to move away from him, then He said, Measure the distance between them. They found that he was closer to (the good town) by a hand-span, so he was forgiven." (Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 3283; Muslim, 2766).

But if a sinner dies in a state of sin, if his sins include shirk, then Allaah will not forgive him in the Hereafter. If his sins are less than that, then the person is subject to the will of Allaah _ if He wills, He will punish him and if He wills, He will forgive him.

Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning): "Verily, Allaah forgives not that partners should be set up with Him (in worship), but He forgives except that (anything else) to whom He wills" [al-Nisaa' 4:48, 116].

It was reported that Ibn `Umar said: I heard the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) say: "The believer will be brought close to his Lord until He conceals him and makes him confess his sin. Allaah will say, `Do you remember such and such a sin?' The man will say, `Yes, I admit it.' The Lord will say, `I concealed it for you in the world and I forgive you for it today.' Then He will close up his record of good deeds. As for the others or the Kuffaar, it will be called out before the witnesses, `These are the ones who disbelieved in their Lord. The curse of Allaah is upon the wrongdoers.'" (Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 4408; Muslim, 2768).

Your despairing of the mercy of Allaah is not permissible, because of the following evidence (daleel):

Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning): "Say: "O `Ibaadi (My slaves) who have transgressed against themselves (by committing evil deeds and sins)! Despair not of the Mercy of Allaah, verily, Allaah forgives all sins. Truly, He is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful" [al-Zumar 39:53]. And He says (interpretation of the meaning): "… and My Mercy embraces all things…" [al-A'raaf 7:156]

It was reported from Abu Moosa that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "Allaah spreads out His hand at night to accept the repentance of those who committed sins during the day, and He spreads out His hand during the day to accept the repentance of those who committed sins during the night. (He will continue to do this) until the sun rises from the West." (Narrated by Muslim, 2759).

Speaking about your sin and flaunting it openly in front of your friends is haraam, and is a major sin. It is one of the ways of spreading immorality among the Muslims, encouraging evil and tempting others to do similar things. It also means that one does not take sin seriously and regards it as insignificant, and that the sinner is damaging his own reputation and exposing his honour to the slander of others. Islam seeks to put people off from doing such things in the strongest possible terms, as in the following hadeeth:

Abu Hurayrah said: I heard the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) say: "All of my ummah will be forgiven except those who sin openly. It is a part of sinning openly when a man does something at night, then the following morning when Allaah has concealed his sin, he says, `O So and so, I did such and such last night,' when all night his Lord has concealed him and the next morning he uncovers what Allaah had concealed." (Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 5721; Muslim, 2990).

Shaykh Ibn `Uthaymeen (may Allaah preserve him) said: there is a third kind of immoral, rebellious, promiscuous person, who speaks in a boastful manner about zinaa (fornication, adultery) _ we seek refuge with Allaah _ and tells people that he travelled to such and such a country and committed immoral acts of zinaa with a number of women, and so on, and he shows off about that. Such people should be asked to repent, and if they do not they should be executed, because when a person boasts about zinaa, this implies that he thinks it is permissible _ Allaah forbid _ and the one who thinks that zinaa is halaal is a kaafir. (Sharh Riyaad al-Saaliheen, 1/116).

On this basis:

We advise you to repent sincerely, and if you are tested with any kind of sin, do not speak openly of it or brag about it. You should be aware of the greatness of the One against Whom you are sinning, seek forgiveness for your sin, weep for the error of your ways and adhere strictly to the path of Allaah. Beware of despairing of the mercy of Allaah. If you adhere properly to the religion of Allaah, you will have glad tidings of goodness in this world and in the Hereafter. We ask Allaah to help us and you to do that which He loves and is pleased with. May Allaah bless our Prophet Muhammad.

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Sheikh Muhammed Salih Al-Munajjid (www.islam-qa.com)

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6044: Reading and writing fantasy stories

Question:

Is it permissible in Islam to read and write fantasy novels and stories? Fantasy here refers to princesses, castles, magic and things you would find in a fairy tale, for instance.


Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

1. With regard to reading these stories, this is a waste of time. People are deceived by the idea of "free" time, for it is one of the things about which they will be questioned on the Day of Resurrection.

It was narrated that Ibn `Abbaas (may Allaah be pleased with him) said: the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "There are two blessings which many people do not make the most of: good health and free time." (Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 6049)

Abu Barzah al-Aslami said: the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "A person will not be let go on the Day of Resurrection until he has been asked about his life and how he spent it, his knowledge and what he did with it, his wealth and from where he earned it and where he spent it, and his body and how he used it."

(Narrated and classed as saheeh by al-Tirmidhi, 2417)

2. As for writing these stories, in addition to the above point that it is a waste of time, it also involves a second forbidden matter, which is lying; lying cannot be avoided if one is to write in an attractive and compelling manner about things that do not exist.

If a person has to write, then let him write about something that is real and happens in the lives of people nowadays, writing about things that really happened to him or to others, from which lessons can be drawn. Or let him write by way of giving examples and allegories, stating that in an introduction. Even better than that, let him write about the real and saheeh stories that have been narrated in the Qur'aan and Sunnah, or about the lives and biographies of great Islamic personalities such as the Prophets, scholars and righteous people, or

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6261: Ruling on being alone with a homosexual

Question:

What is the ruling on being alone with a homosexual?

Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

We put this question to Shaykh `Abd-Allaah ibn Jibreen, may Allaah preserve him, who answered as follows:

If he feels certain that this will pose no temptation (fitnah), then it is OK.

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Sheikh Muhammed Salih Al-Munajjid (www.islam-qa.com)

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6376: He wants to commit suicide because they rejected his marriage proposal

Question:

I am the brother who asked the question about whether it was allowed for a girl who I wanted to marry to study in university in a corrupt society. But now I have a new problem, the girl does not want to marry me any more because I'm from India and she's from pakistan and she feels that her mother will not allow us to marry and will kick her out. Does her mother have the right to stop us from getting married just because we'er from different countries? This whole situation is making me feel extremely upset. Its been about 2 weeks since it happened and I feel extremely depressed, I been constanly crying, I haven't eaten anything, I just can't get any sleep and I feel like I want to kill my self. I just can't cope with this situation any longer, what am I to do? I need help and your the only reliable source I can turn to, I am desperate for help. Please brother answer my questions, I just can't bear this pain any longer. Thank you, and any answer will be GREATLY appreciated.


Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
"And do not kill yourselves. Surely, Allaah is Most merciful to you. And whoever commits that through aggression and injustice, We shall cast him into the Fire…" [al-Nisa' 4:29-30]

No matter what psychological pressure or extreme distress befalls him, the Muslim cannot go ahead and kill himself, because he knows that the punishment for that is Hell and a painful torment, as the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said:

"Whoever throws himself down from a mountain and kills himself, he will be in the Fire of Hell throwing himself down for ever and ever. Whoever drinks poison and kills himself will have the poison in his hand, drinking it in the Fire of Hell for ever and ever. Whoever kills himself with a piece of iron [a weapon] will have that piece of iron in his hand, stabbing himself in the stomach with it in the Fire of Hell forever and ever." (Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 5778).

Starving oneself to death by refusing food is also a kind of suicide and deliberately killing oneself. How can a Muslim who believes in Allaah and the Last Day think of trying to move from the suffering of this world to the suffering of the Hereafter, which is more severe and more long-lasting? No sane person would do this. And for what? For a woman, when you could always find another woman to marry, for there are many women besides this one. Moreover, circumstances may change, and they may change their minds and agree to the marriage after a while. You could look for a college or school in your country that is only for women, which your wife could join, and that would solve a part of the problem. Whatever the case, you have to seek the help of Allaah and persevere with sabr (patience).

Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
"And whosoever fears Allaah and keeps his duty to Him, He will make a way for him to get out (from every difficulty)." [al-Talaaq 65:2]

"Allaah will grant after hardship, ease." [al-Talaaq 65:7]

We also suggest that you refer to the book "Alhomoom - Dealing with Worries and Stress", which is to be found on this web-site, and put into practise some of the things described therein, to calm you down and restore your equilibrium. Allaah is the One Whom We ask to relieve your distress and grief. May Allaah bless our Prophet Muhammad and his family and companions, and grant them peace.

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Sheikh Muhammed Salih Al-Munajjid (www.islam-qa.com)

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4505: Writing fiction stories

Question:

My question is, is writing Islamic based fictional stories which are meant for da'wah, islaahi and creating awareness among the Ummah, especially
the youth, by using the imagination, sinful in Islam?
In other words is it sinful to imagine words, ideas and situations? And what's the difference between folklore and this kind of modern writings?


Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

If it is made perfectly clear that this did not really happen, and that the story is being told just to give an example, then there is nothing wrong with that, but one should be careful to ensure that the style, contents and goal are beneficial and that the story helps to explain something about Islam and serves as a effective means of teaching and guiding people. We ask Allaah to grant you strength

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4329: Accusing a Muslim of drinking wine

Question:

What is the ruling on someone (muslim) saying lies about his other brother.i.e saying he drinks Alcohol and other sort of things.


Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

Accusing a Muslim of doing an evil deed without proof is a major sin which deserves punishment. Talking about it to other people is a kind of gheebah (backbiting, gossip) which Allaah has forbidden and likened to a person eating the flesh of his dead brother, as He says (interpretation of the meaning):

"… neither backbite one another. Would one of you like to eat the flesh of his dead brother? You would hate it (so hate backbiting). And fear Allaah. Verily, Allaah is the One Who accepts repentance, Most Merciful."[al-Hujuraat 49:12]

"Verily, those who like that (the crime of) illegal sexual should be propagated among those who believe, they will have a painful torment in this world and in the Hereafter…" [al-Noor 24:19].

Whoever slanders his brother or accuses him of an evil deed has to repent to Allaah, ask his brother's forgiveness, and avoid everything that causes harm to a fellow Muslim. Abu Hurayrah (may Allaah be pleased with him) reported that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "Whoever believes in Allaah and the Last Day, let him say something good or else remain silent." (Reported by al-Bukhaari, 11/256, and by Muslim, no. 47). Abu Dharr (may Allaah be pleased with him) said: "I heard the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) say: `No man accuses another of an immoral deed or kufr, but it will come back on him, if the person he accuses is not as he says he is.'" (Reported by al-Bukhari, 10/388). Accusing a Muslim of drinking wine is the same as accusing him of an immoral deed (fisq), and whoever accuses his brother of something he is not guilty of, Allaah will make him fall into the thing he of which he accused his brother. A man was brought to `Abd-Allaah ibn `Abbaas, and he was told, "This is so and so, his beard was dripping with wine." [Ibn `Abbaas] said, "We were forbidden to spy on others, but if something is obvious to us, we will accept it and act accordingly." (Reported by Abu Dawood, 4890, who said it is a saheeh hasan hadeeth).

It is not permissible for the Muslim to spy on his Muslim brother or to seek out his faults. If he accidentally sees him in a doubtful place or seeming to behave in a doubtful manner, he should not accuse him unless he sees him with his own eyes doing a wrongful action. He should advise and counsel him, then if he insists on doing that thing, and there is fear that he may harm other Muslims, or if one is asked about him for a legitimate reason, then he should tell those who have something to do with it about what he knows. But he should not broadcast it unless the person does the evil action openly, because this will only help the Shaytaan against him and stop him from repenting. And Allaah knows best.

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Sheikh Muhammed Salih Al-Munajjid (www.islam-qa.com)

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3108: Writing down the name of a person who is absent from work as if he is present

Question:

Sometimes my colleagues at college or at work ask me to make it look as if they are present even though they are absent, so that when the attendance sheet comes around, I should write their names. Is this a human service or is it deception and cheating?


Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

This is a kind of service, but it is satanic service which the Shaytaan is instilling in the person who does this and makes it appear that someone is present when this is not the case. There are three reasons for having reservations about this practice:

(1) It is lying; (2) it involves deceiving those who are in charge; (3) it makes the absent person entitled to wages on the basis of attendance, which he then takes and consumes unlawfully. One of these reservations alone is sufficient to make this practice, which the questioner apparently sees as a human service or favour, be described as haraam. Not all human favours are praiseworthy; only those that coincide with sharee'ah are praiseworthy _ those that go against sharee'ah are to be condemned. Calling favours that go against sharee'ah "human services" is in fact a misnomer, because anything that goes against sharee'ah is a bestial action. This is why Allaah described the kuffaar and mushrikeen as being like cattle. He says (interpretation of the meaning): "… while those who disbelieve enjoy themselves and eat as cattle eat, and the Fire will be their abode." [Muhammad 47:12] and "…They are only like cattle; - nay, they are even farther astray from the Path…" [al-Furqaan 25:44]. So everything that is contrary to sharee'ah is a bestial action, not human.

(Fataawa Islamiyyah, Ibn `Uthaymeen, 220). (www.islam-qa.com)

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762: Ruling on wearing one's clothes below one's ankles

Question:

Assalamu Alaikum

A brother was telling me that wearing clothing below the ankles is haram and that there are many hadiths that prove this. I would appreciate your opinion on this matter.

Jazakallah


Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

What your friend has told you is true. Many ahaadeeth were reported from the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) which forbid isbaal (wearing one's clothes below the ankles), for example:

Al-Bukhaari reported that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "Whatever of the izaar (lower garment) is below the ankles is in the Fire." (al-Bukhaari, no. 5787)

The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "There are three whom Allaah will not look at or praise on the Day of Judgement and theirs will be a painful punishment: the one who wears his garment below his ankles, the one who reminds others of his favours, and the one who sells his product by means of making false oaths" (reported by Muslim, no. 106)

The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "Isbaal (wearing one's garment below the ankles) may apply to the izaar (lower garment), the shirt or the turban. Whoever allows any part of these to trail on the ground out of arrogance, Allaah will not look at him on the Day of Judgement." (reported by Abu Dawud, no. 4085, and al-Nisaa'i, no. 5334, with a saheeh isnaad).

Ibn `Abbaas reported that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "Allaah will not look at the one who wears his lower garment below his ankles." (Reported by al-Nisaa'i in al-Mujtabaa, Kitaab al-Zeenah, Baab Isbaal al-Izaar).

Hudhayfah said: "The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) took hold of the muscle of my calf (or his calf) and said, `This is where the izaar should stop; if you insist, it may be lower, but it should not reach the ankles.'" (Reported by al-Tirmidhi, who said this is a saheeh hasan hadeeth; see Sunan al-Tirmidhi, no. 1783)

All of the ahaadeeth quoted above speak against isbaal, whether or not the intention is to show off; but if a person does this deliberately out of arrogance, there is no doubt that his sin is greater. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "Allaah will not look at the one who trails his izaar on the ground out of pride." (al-Bukhaari, no. 5788)

Jaabir ibn Sulaym said: "The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said to me: `Beware of wearing one's lower garment below the ankles, because this is a kind of showing-off, and Allaah does not love showing-off.'" (Regarded as saheeh by al-Tirmidhi, no. 2722).

No one is able to be completely free of pride and arrogance, even if he claims that this is so. Such a claim is unacceptable, because by saying it, he is praising himself. Only in the case of those whom the wahy (revelation) testified that they were free of pride do we believe that this is the case. For example, there is a hadeeth which states that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "Whoever trails his garment on the ground out of pride, Allaah will not look at him on the Day of Resurrection." Abu Bakr said to him, "O Messenger of Allaah, my izaar slips down if I do not pay attention to it." He said: "You are not one of those who do it out of pride." (Reported by al-Bukhaari, no. 5784)

What indicates that isbaal is prohibited even if it is not done out of pride is the hadeeth of Abu Sa'eed al-Khudri, may Allaah be pleased with him, who said: "The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: `The lower garment of the Muslim should come down to mid-calf, but there is nothing wrong if it is between that point and the ankles. Whatever is lower than the ankles is in the Fire. Whoever trails his garment on the ground out of pride, Allaah will not look at him." (Reported by Abu Dawud, no. 4093, with a saheeh isnaad.)

These ahaadeeth describe two different deeds, for which there will be two different punishments:
Imaam Ahmad reported that Abd al-Rahmaan ibn Ya'qoob said: "I asked Abu Sa'eed: `Did you hear anything from the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) concerning the izaar (lower garment)?' he said, `Yes, listen! `The izaar of the believer should come to mid-calf, although there is nothing wrong if it comes between there and the ankles, but whatever is lower than the ankles is in the Fire,' and he said it three times."

Ibn `Umar said: "I passed by the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him), and my izaar had slipped down. He said, `O `Abdullaah, pull up your izaar!' so I pulled it up. He said, `More!' so I pulled it up more, and always made sure it was pulled up properly after that." Some people asked, "To where did you pull it up?" He said, "To mid-calf length." (Reported by Muslim, no. 2086; al-Dhahabi, Kitaab al-Kabaa'ir, 131-132)

The issue of isbaal applies to women just as much as it applies to men. This is indicated by the hadeeth of Ibn `Umar, may Allaah be pleased with him, who said: "The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: `Whoever trails his garment on the ground out of pride, Allaah will not look at him.' Umm Salamah said: `O Messenger of Allaah, what should women do with their hems?' He said, `Let them go down a handspan.' She asked, `What if their feet show?' He said, `Let them lengthen it by a cubit, but no more.'" (al-Nisaa'i, Kitaab al-zeenah, Baab dhuyool al-nisaa').

The punishment for showing off may come to pass in this world, not in the Hereafter. Abu Hurayrah reported that the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "Whilst a man was walking arrogantly admiring himself and his clothes, Allaah caused the earth to swallow him and he is suffering in it until the Day of Resurrection." (Reported by Muslim, no. 2088).

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110: Ruling on smoking

Question:

Is smoking cigarettes Haraam?


Answer:

Praise be to Allah and peace and blessings be on His Prophet SAWS.

Smoking is one of the things which has caused a lot of problems and harm these days and it has spread like wild fire. Before we discuss this topic in detail, we should know that Allaah the Almighty has divided things in the world into two types, good or permissible (al-tayyibaat, al-halaal) and evil or prohibited (al-khabaa'ith, al-haraam), and there is no third type. Allah says (interpretation of the meaning) in surat al-A'raaf (7:157):

"And He makes good things halaal for them and bad things haraam."

Considering this fact, smoking can either be permissible and good or prohibited and evil.

Thus, we present some of its characteristics and let the person asking the question see himself in which type lies smoking.

There is no disagreement among the physicians and sane people that smoking is harmful for health. It is one of the major causes of lung cancer and other diseases. It is also one of the major causes of death. Since, it is known that the Islamic law prohibits everything that is harmful for a human being. Allah said (interpretation of meaning):

"Do not kill yourself. Allah is Merciful unto you." (Surat al-Nisaa' 4:29)

In addition, His Prophet SAWS (peace be upon him) said:

"There is no harm or causing of harm (in Islaam)." (Arabic "laa darar wa laa diraar")

He SAWS (peace be upon him) also said:

"A person will not be able to move on the Day of Judgment until he is asked about ... his body as to what he engaged it in."

Smoking also goes against the saying of the Prophet SAWS:

"Your body has a right on you."

There is no disagreement among the physicians and sane people that smoking is harmful for the health of others who inhale the polluted breath of the smoker. Medical research has proven the harmful effects of smoking mothers on their children.

The offensive smell caused by smoking is a source of pain to the worshippers of Allah among humans and angels. The angels are offended and suffer from the same things that the human beings suffer from. Allah said (interpretation of the meaning):

"Those who cause harm to believing men and women without any reason do a great sin." (Surat al-Ahzaab, 33:58)

The money that is spent on cigarettes is used on buying a harmful thing and is therefore an extravagance. Allah said (interpretation of the meaning):

"… and do not be extravagant wasters. Those who are extravagant are kinsmen of Satan." (Surat al-Israa' 17:26-27)

Extravagance (in Islam) means spending on something haraam.

Spending money on cigarettes is a waste of resources as well. The Prophet SAWS (peace be upon him) said:

"A person will not be able to move on the Day of Judgment until he is asked about ..... what he owned as to how he spent it."

Considering all that has been presented, it can be clearly seen that smoking is an evil among many others. It is not permissible to indulge in it, or buy and sell it, or even to offer it to others. It is incumbent on a person who is addicted to it that he must make all efforts and get whatever necessary treatment to stop it. If the unbelievers have understood the harm caused by smoking and made laws regarding it, the Muslims should be even more eager to stop it and treat those who are addicted to it.

We ask Allah the Almighty to cure everyone indulging in this evil and help him in giving it up. Allah is the Best Guide to the Right Path.

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329: Ruling on masturbation and how to cure the problem

Question:

I have a question which I am shy to ask but another sister who has come to Islam recently wants an answer to and I do not have an answer (with dilals from the Qur'an and Sunnah). I hope you can help and I hope Allah will for give me if it is inappropriate but as Muslims we should never be shy in seeking knowledge. Her question was "Is it permissible in Islam to masturbate?".

May Allah increase us all in knowledge.


Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

Masturbation (for both men and women) is haraam (forbidden) in Islam based on the following evidence:

First from the Qur'aan:

Imam Shafi'i stated that masturbation is forbidden based on the following verses from the Qur'aan (interpretation of the meaning):

"And those who guard their chastity (i.e. private parts, from illegal sexual acts). Except from their wives or (the captives and slaves) that their right hands possess, - for them, they are free from blame. But whoever seeks beyond that, then those are the transgressors." 23.5-7 Here the verses are clear in forbidding all illegal sexual acts (including masturbation) except for the wives or that their right hand possess. And whoever seeks beyond that is the transgressor.

"And let those who find not the financial means for marriage keep themselves chaste, until Allah enriches them of His bounty." 24.33. This verse also clearly orders whoever does not have the financial means to marry to keep himself chaste and be patient in facing temptations (including masturbation) until Allah enriches them of His bounty.

Secondly, from the sunnah of the Prophet (peace be upon him):

Abdullaah ibn Mas'ood said, "We were with the Prophet while we were young and had no wealth whatsoever. So Allaah's Messenger said, "O young people! Whoever among you can marry, should marry, because it helps him lower his gaze and guard his modesty (i.e. his private parts from committing illegal sexual intercourse etc.), and whoever is not able to marry, should fast, as fasting diminishes his sexual power." Bukhari:5066. The hadeeth orders men who are not able to marry to fast despite the hardship encountered in doing so, and not to masturbate despite the ease with which it can be done.

There are additional evidences that can be cited to support this ruling on masturbation, but due to the limited space we will not go through them here. Allaah knows what is best and most correct.

As for curing the habit of masturbation, we recommend the following suggestions:

1) The motive to seek a cure for this problem should be solely following Allaah's orders and fearing His punishment.

2) A permanent and quick cure from this problem lies in marriage as soon as the person is able, as shown in the Prophet's hadeeth.

3) Keeping oneself busy with what is good for this world and the hereafter is essential in breaking this habit before it becomes second nature after which it is very difficult to rid oneself of it.

4) Lowering the gaze (from looking at forbidden things such as pictures, movies etc.) will help suppress the desire before it leads one to commit the haraam (forbidden). Allaah orders men and women to lower their gaze as shown in the following two verses and in the Prophet's hadeeth (interpretations of the meanings):

"Tell the believing men to lower their gaze (from looking at forbidden things) and protect their private parts (from illegal sexual acts, etc.). That is purer for them. Verily, Allah is all-aware of what they do. And tell the believing women to lower their gaze (from looking at forbidden things) and protect their private parts (from illegal sexual acts, etc.) ..... " 24.30-31

Allaah's messenger said: "Do not follow a casual (unintentional) look (at forbidden things) with another look." Al-Tirmidhi 2777. This is a general instruction by the Prophet to abstain from all that may sexually excite a person because it might lead him/her to commit the haraam (forbidden).

5) Using one's available leisure time in worshipping Allaah and increasing religious knowledge.

6) Being cautious not to develop any of the medical symptoms that may result from masturbation such as weak eyesight, weak nervous system, and/or back pain. More importantly, feeling of guilt and anxiety that can be complicated by missing obligatory prayers because of the need to shower (ghusl) after every incidence of masturbation.

7) Avoiding the illusion that some youth have that masturbation is permissible because it prevents them from committing illegal sexual acts such as fornication or even homosexuality.

8) Strengthening one's willpower and avoiding spending time alone as recommended by the Prophet when he said "Do not spend the night alone" Ahmad 6919.

9) Following the Prophet's aforementioned hadeeth and fast when possible, because fasting will temper one's sexual desire and keep it under control. However, one should not overreact and swear by Allaah not to return to the act because if one does not honor one's promise, one would be facing the consequences of not living up to one's oath to Allaah. Also, note that medication to diminish one's sexual desire is strictly prohibited because it might permanently affect one's sexual ability.

10) Trying to follow the Prophet's recommendation concerning the etiquette of getting ready for bed, such as reading well-known supplications, sleeping on the right side, and avoiding sleeping on the belly (the Prophet forbade sleeping on the belly).

11) Striving hard to be patient and chaste, because persistence will eventually, Allaah willing, lead to attaining those qualities as second nature, as the Prophet explains in the following hadeeth:
"Whoever seeks chastity Allaah will make him chaste, and whoever seeks help from none but Allaah, He will help him, and whoever is patient He will make it easy for him, and no one has ever been given anything better than patience." Bukhari:1469.

12) Repenting, asking forgiveness from Allaah, doing good deeds, and not losing hope and feeling despair are all prerequisites to curing this problem. Note that losing hope is one of the major sins punishable by Allaah.

13) Finally, Allaah is the Most Merciful and He always responds to whoever calls on Him. So, asking for Allah's forgiveness will be accepted, by His will.

Wallahu a'lam. And Allah knows what is best and most correct.

Islam Q&A

Sheikh Muhammed Salih Al-Munajjid (www.islam-qa.com)

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Islam: Questions And Answers - Character and Morals

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